TNA Fan Edition Promo Archive Thread

[Title Master Mikey]

Similar to the WCWWE thread, every WCTNA promo can be found right here along with which wrestler did the promo and who wrote it. However, rather than having each individual wrestler in a post, multiple promos will be posted at once. Promos that are not apart of shows can be viewed as WCTNA.com exclusives. Let's begin.
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WCTNA Management - Iron Giant

Memo:

WCTNA Management Director, Jim Cornette, will be making a statement following the draft tonight. All participants are expected to attend.

Regards,

WCTNA Management.
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Christian Cage - The Tank



The Champ is here.

If it's not clear (Which it should be crystal clear, as far as I'm concerned.), I've chosen Christian Cage.
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Booker T - Brahma Bull

Ah Sting. We as part of the mafia shall rule the TNA Kingdom!
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Mike Tenay & Don West - Iron Giant


*As the credits roll for this special edition of Impact, we cut to the WCTNA announcing team*



"Welcome everyone, I'm Mike Tenay!"



"And I'm Don West!"



"Welcome To the WCTNA Draft - LIVE!"
[/color]
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Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

BUT YOU BERR ESPEK A HUGE VICKRY SPEECH FOR DA DAYBYOO A BIG POPPA PUMP!! B'RIGHNOW, I GOTTA GIT OUTTA HERE! DIS PLACES STARNA SMELL LIKE SMELLY HALF-BREEDS!!
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Kurt Angle - starwolf013

The Main Event Mafia will always prevail over the disrespectful punks in WCTNA. Oh it's real, my family... It's damn real!
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Christian Cage - The Tank

Oh, it's real? Nah, Kurt, it isn't real. You and your Goodfella wannabes aren't gonna rule anything as long as The Instant Classic is still in TNA. Because where the TNA Frontline is failing..........The Coalition will succeed. And THAT is real.
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Mike Tenay, Don West & Jim Cornette - Iron Giant



Tenay: "We're joined here by the WCTNA Management Director, Jim Cornette and we know Jeff Jarrett is backstage overseeing the draft this evening - and what an evening so far, Don!"

West: (frothing with intensity) "WHAT A NIGHT! WAH!!!! SO FAR WE'VE HAD ABYSS, BOOKER T, KURT ANGLE, SCOTT STEINER, STING, ALEX SHELLEY, CHRISTIAN CAGE - THEY'VE ALL BEEN PICKED AND THEY'RE ALL PART OF THE NEW WCTNA. WOW!"

Tenay: "Yes, so far about a quarter of the roster gone, there are just under 50 minutes left in which to get your draft picks in. Pick now and be part of the new TNA! Jim Cornette is here with us as well, Jim, what are your thoughts so far?"

Cornette: "Yes, this is truly a historic event but people - you gotta be in to win it. Take part and become part of WCTNA! And stayed tuned for my announcement after this show."

West: "WOW! AN ANNOUNCEMENT! THIS IS GONNA BE HUGE, MIKE, THIS IS GONNA...BE.... HUUUUUGGEEE!"
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Kurt Angle - starwolf013

The Coalition? I know that you have your head shoved so far up your rear-end that you haven't probably noticed, but the Main Event Mafia is well represented here with Booker, Sting, Steiner, and your Olympic Gold Medalist. Looks to me like you are going need some more kids for your coalition. Is this really the best Jarrett can do?
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Booker T - Brahma Bull

Now Can You Dig That.......Sucka?
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Abyss - Amigo

I have neutral feelings for both the TNA Frontline and Main Event Mafia. Just don't get in my way of the title, and I won't impale you on glass.
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Mike Tenay & Don West - Iron Giant



West: "BREAKING NEWS, MIKE - SAMOA JOE! SAMOA JOE! EVERYONE HAD BETTER WATCH OUT FOR THE SAMOAN SUBMISSION MACHINE! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!"



Tenay: "....Thanks, Don."[/color]
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Mike Tenay & Don West - Iron Giant



West: "NO PELE! NO PELE! AJ STYLES IS STILL UP FOR SELECTION! WHAT AM I GONNA DO WITHOUT THE PE-LEEEEEEEEEEE?!"

Tenay: "I know how much you enjoy seeing the Pele, Don. But we got many stars left to choose from. Pick now!"
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Christian Cage - The Tank

Oh, I can "dig" that, sucka. But, I think I've got something that you need to "dig". Your little "Mafia" isn't as secure as you think.

And, I've got some connections of my own, trust me.
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Mike Tenay, Don West & Jim Cornette - Iron Giant



Tenay: "Well, this has been an extraordinary night - the Main Event Mafia making their presence felt already as the likes of Christian Cage, Samoa Joe and Abyss amongst others aim to do the same."

West: "UNBELIEVABLE. JUST UNBELIEVABLE. I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT A GREAT NIGHT IT'S BEEN, MIKE! SO MANY GREAT SUPERSTARS AND WHAT A FIRST SHOW WE GOT TO LOOK FORWARD TO! MAYBE I'LL EVEN GET TO SAY PE-LEEEEEEEEE?!!!! OH MY HEAD COULD EXPLODE I'M SO EXCITED!"

Tenay: "...I know the feeling, Don... Anyhow, we must sign off as coming up after this broadcast, our Management Director, Jim Cornette, has a few important words for everyone!"

*LIVE FEED ENDS*

-------------------------------------------

*Immediately following the draft, the following video plays*

uk.youtube.com/watch?v=JRlI1NDCcgw

*We cut to WCTNA Management Director, Jim Cornette, who is stood in the ring talking direct to the camera*



Cornette: "It is my pleasure to welcome you all to the revitalised, revamped and relaunched Total Nonstop Action, here on WCTV!"

*smiles at camera briefly*

Cornette: "May I take a brief moment to thank you all, whether you're a viewer or a participant because without you this show means nothing."

*smiles but then turns serious*

Cornette: "But first of all - I'd like to set some ground rules. They'll all be available on the first page of the WCTNA website and I expect you all to obey them. Whilst we here in the Impact Zone consider ourselves a democratic, understanding bunch, there are things that you all must know because I, Jim Cornette, do not want to have to repeat myself over and over. We'll all be bound by the same rules with the idea of creating an orderly yet fair working environment."

*holds the camera's gaze momentarily then relaxes and breaks into a smile again*

Cornette: "...Now, that's the tough stuff out of the way. On to the good stuff. The wrestling. Oh yes, this will be action over entertainment, this will be ability over appearance - this will be the epitomy of Professional Wrestling worldwide! And to demonstrate our ambition, we intend to have one hell of a show come Tuesday night at 5pm EST / 11pm GMT. Every single title will be on the line and depending on those who have signed up in the roster, every single person will be given an opportunity to claim golden glory on this historic first night!"

*re-adjusts his jacket and fiddles with his glasses*

Cornette: "For the moment, all previous rankings will be recognised. Legends, Main Eventers, Knockouts, Tag Teams and those in the X Division will be expected to take part at that level until we ascertain those who have the potential and the desire to succeed in the the new WCTNA. There will be no glass ceiling here. We don't intend to just cross the line, no, the line will be a dot as we race to a long and enjoyable future."

*Bends down and picks up a clipboard from canvas*

Cornette: "I'm still finalising who will face who and in what match but once I and the WCTNA management have made our decisions, the card for the first Impact taping will be listed on the website. Please feel free to use the TNA thread or the Private Messaging service if you wish to speak to me at any point. Until Tuesday, I thank you for your time."

*LIVE FEED ENDS*





THIS TUESDAY 5PM ET / 11PM GMT!
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Sting - M.O.P

(*walks into the Main Event Mafia locker room wearing his best suit*)
How is everyone tonight? And where's Nash?
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[Title Master Mikey]

Sting - M.O.P

And the Family is complete! Welcome Big Sexy!
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Kevin Nash - Evil M

Well, Stinger, it's an honor to be here. And to everyone else on the roster, I got 3 words for ya: We're Takin' Over!

Um, Mr. Nash? That's Stevie Richards' line.

Stevie who?

Stevie Richards. Big Stevie Cool?

Did him and I sell out the Garden?

I don't think so, Mr. Nash.

Then I never heard of him!

*Throws the production guy out of the room*

Anyway, to recap: Me, Main Event Mafia, taking over, rest of TNA, totally screwed. Thank you.
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Christian Cage - The Tank

And then there were five......five pretentious, self-righteous ass-clowns walking around like they're God's gift to wrestling. Well, here's a reality check, guys:

Scott Steiner, Booker T, the only reason you guys are "World Champions" is because the "Powers That Be" pissed off Hulk Hogan back in the day, and your buddy Kevin Nash was too lazy to be useful, so you two were all WCW had to run the show!

Kurt Angle...newsflash, buddy: You got lucky. Sure, you've got the amateur wrestling background, and you've got the World Titles, and you won an Olympic Gold Medal...

*clears throat*

WITH A BROKEN FREAKIN' NECK!!!

But, Kurt, once again: you got lucky. And now that you're in TNA, you've just lucked out time and time again. Got so and so wrapped up in whatever crap you were spewing because they were either too stupid to get anywhere by themselves or just didn't give a crap either way. And now...hey, would you look at that! It's just the same as the Angle Alliance! Only difference is that this time, you're not the center of attention, Kurt. Whether you think you are or not.

Sting...I can't lie, Sting. I respect you. I personally don't think you need the Main Event Mafia, but you've made your decision and you're sticking with it, apparently. So that's fine. You can sink with the rest of them.

As for the guys on this roster that aren't complete jackasses...

Samoa Joe...you and I haven't gotten along in the past. But, if the Mafia's gonna run around and consider everyone an enemy, then we may at least not want to be enemies ourselves.

Abyss...I've done things or had things done to you that if you had justice delivered for them, I'd be six feet under. But, that's not important. What's important is that the Mafia's got guns lined at all of us, and we can't afford to be fighting each other, or we're all gonna end up full of bullets.

Alex Shelley...you're the future of wrestling, kid. But, remember: Billy Kidman was supposed to be the future of wrestling. Paul London was supposed to be the future of wrestling. Hell, Chuck Palumbo was supposed to be the future of wrestling, and look where them and the dozens...no, hundreds of guys like them ended up with guys like this running around "protecting their spots"!!!

Everyone who's here for TNA and not here for themselves: Christian Cage is taking the Main Event Mafia down. Whether it's by myself or with an army at my back, I don't care. I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna save TNA. I'm gonna save these young guys who don't have a future if the Mafia is here. I'm gonna save pro wrestling.

And if ya don't know...now ya know.
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Kevin Nash - Evil M

Lazy?! Whaddaya mean lazy?! I was busy selling out arenas everywhere, and you're callin' me lazy?!

Mr. Nash, he's referring to your time down south.

I knew that!

*Throws the production guy out of the room*

Carry on.
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Sting - M.O.P

Know what makes me sad, Christian? I respect you, too. I think you've done a lot more for the WWE (crowd BOOS) and the professional wrestling world in general that many people, including Vince McMahon, (crowd boos and starts a "Vince Sucks!" chant. Sting pauses to look around at his fellow MEM members and the Impact Zone) would ever like to admit.

But you need to understand, Christian. This isn't a battle about wealth. And while this battle will involve championships and power struggles, it isn't necessarily about them either. This is a battle for respect! (Booker T yells "RE-SPEEEEEEEECT!") This is a battle for honor! This is a battle of moral concepts. All we ask for is the recognition and respect (Booker T yells "RE-SPEEEEEEEECT!" again) that men of our caliber deserve. Each and every one of us has busted our asses off to get to where we are today. We've made names for ourselves, sold out arenas all over the world, and won more titles between us than any other stable in professional wrestling history! And it's because of our passion and love of the business that we're now considered some of the best wrestlers of all-time.

But these young punks. This so-called "frontline." They show no respect for anyone. (Sting flashes a look at Booker telling him 'Don't overdo it.') They can't even respect each other! They care more about playing Guitar Hero and watching crappy reality TV than putting in hours at the gym--yes, I'm looking at you, Joe--and training in the ring. These kids should be trying to squeeze every bit of knowledge they can out of us. Instead, they take us for granted. Well, enough's enough. If they're not going to give us respect, we sure as hell aren't going to show any to them!

But Christian, I thought you were different from those punks. I can't speak for the rest of my family. I'm sure they all have far more vicious words in mind for you, and that's fine because you certainly had enough for us. But I'm not angry at you. I'm simply disappointed. I thought you were better than this.
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Christian Cage - The Tank

Stinger, it's like I said before. I do respect you. I respect your accomplishments, I respect your 10 World Championships, and I respect damn near everything you've done in the over 20 years you've been wrestling.

What I don't respect is your attitude as of late, and the company you're keeping. So, Stinger, let's just make one thing perfectly clear:

What I do to Kevin Nash...it's personal. What I do to Booker T is personal. What I do to Scott Steiner is personal. And you can bet your ass off that everything I do to Kurt Angle is personal, Stinger.

But whatever I end up having to do to you, Sting.........I'm probably gonna end up regretting it in the long run. Which is why I'll say this: It's only business.
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Don West - The Tank

And on behalf of everyone knows who.....

FINALLY!!! FINALLY!!!PELE!!! PELE!!! PELE!!! HE CAME OUT OF NOWHERE, MIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Jim Cornette: "If I could just have everyone's attention for a moment please - these are some of the championships up for grabs this Tuesday on our premier showing of WCTNA iMPACT. The eventually winners we will free to use them in their sigs, coupling the prestige of owning the belt and potentially advertising the company to new talent. Here they are:"










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Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Please note that for anyone wishing to take part and be in the first taping that all sign-ups, promos and requests must ALL be in by Tuesday 5pm GMT / 11am EST.
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Christian Cage - The Tank

So......turns out that people here aren't as reliable as I thought...

Well, that's fine. Like I said, I'll do it alone if I have to. And since it looks like I have to.........

*Christian Cage holds up two steel chairs.*

Then I certainly won't do it unarmed. I know I'm pulling some Warrior stuff here, but The Coalition will be a one-man army if it has to. Either way, I won't stop until the "Family" is dead and buried.

And to the members of the TNA roster who aren't with the Main Event Mafia, I'll say this: If you stand by me, then I welcome your assistance. Stand against me, and I'll get you out of the way by any means necessary.
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Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Just another reminder to everyone.

The cut off time for the first taping is Tuesday 5pm GMT / 12pm EST - I'll need to write everything up after then and I will be aiming to ensure those who bother to play will be the ones getting the big matches and title shots.
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Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

Y'KNOW WHAT, TRISHTIN GAGE!! YOU KIN TAKE YER THREATS, AN YER SEEL CHAIRS, AN YER TRISHIN GOLITION, AN YOU KIN SHUV EM UP YER MISERBLE STINKIN KINADIN ASS, CUZ TH'MAYVINT MAFIA IS GONNA RUN RUSH-ROUGHSHOD, ALL OVER TEENAY!! AND DERE AINT NOTHIN YOU OR YOUR COLITION OR JEFF JARRETT OR JIM CORNETTE OR NO-ONE ELSE IN TEENAY KIN DO BOUT IT!!
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Kevin Nash - Evil M

*Kevin Nash is sitting behind Steiner, reading a comic book*

What? I'm in training!
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Booker T - Brahma Bull

REE-SPECT!
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Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

AN AS FAR AS TH'RESTA TEENAY GOEZ, OBVISLY NOBODY WANTS TO PICK SOMEONE WHO AINT A WINNER!! BOBO-NOBODY WANTS TO PICK A MAN WHO AINT IN THE MAYNIVNT MAFIA!! CUZ THE MAINIVIN MAFIAS IS TH'BEST ORGINZATION IN TH'HISTRY OF PROFESHAL WRESTLING!! TH'REST A YOU, WHO DON WANNA BE WITH TH'MAYVENT MAFIA, ARE CONTENT WIF BEING LOSERS, AND REJECTS, AND YU DON WANNA SUSSEED IN LIFE!! CUZ WHEN IF YOU AINT INNA MANVENT MAFIA, YOU AINT WORTH S***!!
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Homicide - The Tank

Yea, boi! Yea, LAX is here and we gonna dominate TNA, son! SuperMex and the Notorious 187 are gonna go straight to tha top, baby! Straight to tha World Tag Team Championships! Team 3D, Ber Money, Motor City Machineguns, Main Event Mafia, and anybody else dumb enough to get in our way's gon find out what 5150 REALLY means! HORALE! ARRIBA LA RAZA! BRRRAH!!! BRRRRAH!!! BRRRRRRRAH!!!!!!
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Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

[Offcamera] Actually Christian! Christy Hemme appears

I know I may not have been exactly who you had in mind when you decided to refound the Coalition. But the Main Event Mafia has a Knockout, who they seem to conveniently forget every time they want to call themselves the first all world champion wrestling faction, by the name of Sharmell. Fact is, you can't do anything about her Christy smiles an extremly wide smile But I can!
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Hernandez - Sajoa Patrick

Ey yo! Anybody who wanna cross the border and step into LAX Country, you betta bring the Army, you betta bring the Navy, the Air Force, the whole damn military, 'cause we got the whole Latino Nation behind us! Homicide, Hernandez, To Live And Die In LAX!
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Sting - M.O.P

Now, now, Scotty. No need to be threatening Mike Tenay. He's a good guy.

(Otherwise just stands back and let the other members of the Mafia talk, occasionally nodding his head in agreement)
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Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

AN WHY NOT?! I'LL WRING HIS LIL SQUIRREL MONKEY NECK AND KNOCK TH'BOWTIE RIGHT OFF HIS HEAD!!
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Kurt Angle - starwolf013

Christian, Christian, Christian... When will you ever learn? Do they pump something into that canadian air that you breathe that makes you sound like such an idiot? There is no luck when it comes to Kurt Angle, Christian. Luck didn't earn me All-American credentials. Luck didn't factor in winning an Olympic Gold medal with a broken neck. Luck has nothing to do with why Jarrett came to me begging and pleading to join this company and save his sinking ship. That, Christian, is all a result of something you know nothing about. Something called talent.

The ironic thing is that I agree with my family here. You did show some potential for a small period of time. You walked the company line, you did what you were told to do back up north. You showed some class, some character. You screwed all of that up though the moment you crossed my path. You traded the opportunity to shake the hand of nationally known hero for some cheap shots and toilet humor. You showed your true colors and you proved to me that you learned nothing of respect and appreciation for this business.

What makes you think you have the right to stand in the way of the Mafia? You're a former champion? I have news for you Cage, you were a flavor of the month in a forgotten time. You couldn't right this ship back then. That's why Jarrett turned to some more capable hands to finish the job appropriately.

You are nothing Cage. You are no better than the kids backstage that would rather play on their little gameboy videogames than taking time to be mentored by the greats to improve their craft in this business.

These men who stand beside me represent all that was right with professional wrestling, and you better believe that we'll be the ones to bring that back to this little show and to you little punks.

It's real Cage... It's damn real
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Booker T - Brahma Bull

REE-SPECT!
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Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

6PM EST / 11PM GMT TUESDAY 09/12/08 - WCTNA iMPACT! DEBUTS ON WC-TV!
[/b][/u]
Management Director, Jim Cornette, has once again reissued his pledge he made after the draft regarding tomorrow's premier edition of WCTNA iMPACT!Every member of the roster will be involved in a title match as decided by WCTNA manangement. Cornette had this to say:

"It's gonna be one hell of a show - I'm promising equality, extravagance and excellence. Tune in tomorrow evening when I announce who will face who on this historic night!"


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Petey Williams - Evilution

since little petey pump is no longer able to count on big poppa pump to be my hook up i make my stand with the coalition! Now Holla If You Hear ME!
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Christian Cage - The Tank

And The Coalition grows. Just wait, Stinger...Angle...your day's coming.
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Sting - M.O.P

A former Playboy model and a pale imitation of one of my family? Yeah, I'm scared Christian. I'm shaking in my boots right now.
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Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

So I showed off my tits in a magazine, this has absolutly nothing to do with how much ass I can kick. Which, in case you were still wondering, is a lot.
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Christian Cage - The Tank

Stinger...you wanna know the difference between Christy Hemme and the rest of the sluts that got hired up north is? Christy Hemme actually gives a damn about this business! Christy Hemme actually cares about getting better as a wrestler! So, in a company like TNA where the women's division consists of....oh, man, what's the word again? Oh, I remember now, WRESTLERS...I'd say that Christy Hemme fits in perfectly.

And as far as Petey Williams is concerned.........sure, he may have been Steiner's protege for a little while, but everyone makes mistakes every now and then. And just because Maple Leaf Muscle made a dumb mistake and threw his cards in with a steroid junkie that thinks he's a legend doesn't erase the fact that Petey Williams is one of the best young talents on the planet!

Stinger...maybe you should stop criticizing the young talent and start getting ready for a war, because that's sure as hell what we're doing.
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Beer Money - Perpetual Nirvana

What you see before you is potentially the most dominant force in TNA today. What you have is the Cowboy James Storm along with I, Robert Roode and the toughest woman in wrestling, Miss Jackie Moore. And we are Beer Money Incorporated.
See boys and gals, when it comes down to it, two things make the world go round. Beer and money. And we have both.
While others may be struggling in these times of hardship, we have invested in gold. Tag team gold.
So Team 3D have held 500 championships, so LAX are from the streets, so the Motor City Machine Guns are flip flopping all over, we don't give a damn!
Boys, if you take one lesson from life, let it be this. It pays to be sorry bout your damn luck!
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Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Toughest woman in wrestling? TOUGHEST WOMAN IN WRESTLING.

Jackie isn't even the toughest woman is Beer Money Inc.[/color]
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Petey Williams - Evilution

*Petey stops and ponders What Would Arnold Do?*
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Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

KRISHIN CAGE!! FIRST OF ALL, WHAT YOU GOTTA DO, ISH SHUTCHER DAMN MOUTH IF YOU DON KNOW WHATCHER TALKIN ABOUT!! SEE, YOU TALKIN BOUT STEROIDS, WHENYOU KNOW THAT MAH PEAKS IS ALL-NATRAL, AND YER JUSS JEALOUS THAT YOU CANN HAAVE THE BODY OF A JNENIC FREAK, ONE THAT ALL THE GIRLS GO WILD FOR!!

AN SPEAKIN'A GANG-BANGIN' SLUTS, YOU THINK YOU KIN MAKE DAT HOSEBAG CHRISSY HEMME INTO A WRESTLER? DOSE CHICKS IS ONLY GOOD FOR BUMPIN NASTIES WITH, AND DEN WEN YOU USED EM ALL UP, YOU TOSS EM OUT AND WAIT FER THE NEXT ONE!! I GOT FIVE SLUTS JUSS LIKE YOU WAITIN IN MAH HOTEL ROOM, WAITIN FER SASSFASHION, AN IF YOU WANNA BE ONE OF EM, CHRISSY HEMME, YOU COME GET MAH NUMBER AN WAIT IN LINE!!

BUT THE SORRIEST PIECE A'CRAP THAT YOU SIGNED UP FER YOUR COLISHON, KRISHUN GAGE, IS DA MAKE A LEAK MUSCLE, PEEDY WILLIAMS!! PEEDY WILLIAMS, WHEN I FOUND YOU, YOU WERE JUST ANUDDER FLIPPY-DIPPY X DIVISION GUY, WIDDA FLIPPY FLOPPY MOVES THAT WOULDN'T WORK ON ANYBODY OVER A HUNNERD FIFTY POUNDS!! BUT I MADE YOU WHAT YOU ARE TODAY, LIL PEEDY PUMP, AN NOW YOU WANNA JOIN UP WID DA SORRY ASS KO-LISHIN AND THINK YOU KIN TAKE OUT DA MAYVININT MAFIA, WELL, MISTER FLIPPY DIPPY FAKE TAN PIECE OF CRAP, YOU GOT NO CHANCE OF HANGIN WITH DA BIG BOYS!! WEN ITS ALL SAID N DONE, I'M SORRY THAT I WASTED MAH TIME WITCHOO!!

KRISHUN CAGE, EVEN IF YOU WERE TO MANAGE TO BUILD THE SORRIEST KLECKSHIN A'TALENT DAT DIS BIZNIS HAS EVR SEEN, WE AIN'T GONNA LET IT HAPPEN!! CAUSE THE MAYVENT MAFIA IS THE MOST DOMMINT FACTION IN TEENAY, AN WE'RE GONNA END YOUR PATHETIC LIL REGIME BEFORE IT EVER GETS STARTED!!
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Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

11pm GMT / 6pm EST - WCTNA iMPACT! debuts tonight!!!

In other words, make sure your ass is here!
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Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Scott Steiner, you should know that the reason that it took me so long to respond to your tirade was because the though of anyone having sex with your 'roid shrunken dick made me throw up everything I had eaten for the last five years.
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Jim Cornette - WCTNA Management Director Jim Cornette would like to remind participants that we gear our shows towards the family... which doesn't mean the MEM either.



Also... less than two hours until the premiere of WCTNA iMPACT! Join us at 6pm EST / 11pm GMT for what is sure to be a sporting spectacle!

[Title Master Mikey]

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

AW BLOW IT OUT YER ASS CORNETTE!!
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Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

You'll pay for this, Steiner!

*waves fist*

Hang on, I'm supposed to be impartial aren't I?

*thinks for a second*

Carry on as normal, Mr. Scott.
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Christian Cage - The Tank

If these ass-clowns keep up treating you like this, Cornette, you know who to call.

*Hands Cornette a business card.*
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Kevin Nash - Evil M

Jimmy, you'd be much better suited with the Main Event Mafia.

*Everyone looks at Nash*

What? He was a World Champion, wasn't he? He beat Ric Flair, remember?

*Everyone keeps looking at Nash*

Oh wait, wrong Jimmy. I thought you were Jimmy Garvin.

Mr. Nash, Jimmy Garvin was never a World Champion.

He wasn't? Then who am I thinkin' of?

That would be Ronnie Garvin.

YEAH! That's who was I talkin' about. We should get Ronnie Garvin to be in the Main Event Mafia!

*Everyone just walks away*

Hey, where's everybody goin'? Guys? Guys?! GUYS?!!!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Cornette: "What's this?"


____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Just under one hour - I repeat - one hour, until iMPACT!
____________________________________________________

9th December, 2008 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Mike Tenay, Don West & Jim Cornette (Iron Giant), Kurt Angle (starwolf013), Christian Cage (The Tank), Matt Morgan (Amigo) & AJ Styles (Mr. K)



*We begin with a brief recap of the Draft, then we move to Don West and Mike Tenay at ringside*

Tenay: "Welcome one and all to WCTNA iMPACT! Our premiere showing and first night - and Don, what a night it promises to be!"

West: "OH MAN I'M SO PUMPED FOR THIS! IT'S GONNA BE HUGE! THE NEW WCTNA! THE TITLES! I CAN'T WAIT, THE EXCITEMENT IS KILLING ME!!!!!!!"

Tenay: "We can only wish, Don. Without further ado, lets go to our WCTNA Management Director, Jim Cornette, who is standing by to make an announcement regarding tonight's matches."

*Cut to the ring*



Cornette: "Thank you, thank you. Tonight you, the WCTNA fans, will witness a piece of wrestling history. Every single title is up for grabs in a series of matches that include competitors hand-picked by myself, Jim Cornette. Here with me in this very ring, are the titles that can won be this evening."

*crowd pops as the camera focuses in on the titles laid on the plinth*

Cornette: "As for how they'll be won..... well you see, to us in WCTNA, six is a number that has a great deal of importance. Our six-sided ring sets us apart from the competition, so what you'll see tonight is a a recurring theme. Allow me to demonstrate. First up tonight will be a six-man battle royal for the X-Division Championship. Next, the Tag Team Titles will be up for grabs in a mini-tournament involving six of our finest teams. The Women's Title will be contested in another tournament, as six of our knockouts aim to show why they're unparalled in this industry."

*Crowd pops again*

Cornette: "To ensure fairness, no person will be allowed to compete for two championships, which brings me on to the headline event, a match filled to the rafters with starpower. Tonight, we will have-"

*Music hits*



*The group known as The Main Event Mafia make their way out on to the ramp*

Now hold on just a minute there, Cornette. The ONLY way that this company is going to go places is by doing the right thing and awarding the Main Event Mafia sole custody of all titles in WCTNA.

Angle adjusts his suit coat with an arrogant pride.

After all, you do want to be remembered as a success, right? The only way that will happen involves you handing over control to the family. While these boys have no idea how to succeed in this business, the Main Event Mafia is synonymous with success.

Do the right thing Cornette. Put those belts on our waists right now and let the Main Event Mafia lead this company by example. It's not a request.

It's an order...

And it's damn real...

Cornette: "....Well, as I've already stated you'll all-"

*Music hits*



*Christian Cage makes his way out onto the ramp.*

Now hold on a sec here, Jimmy. You're gonna come out here talkin' about the future of TNA, and the future of wrestling...and then you go putting guys like Sting and Kevin Nash at the forefront? I'm sorry to insult you, Cornette, but are you getting Alzheimers or something? Look, I don't know if you're in their pocket or anything, but either wa, The Instant Classic sure as hell isn't gonna let the Main Event Mafia be the ones running this tournament or whatever it is you're gonna do with the TNA World Championship. After all, there's a reason that I'm The Champ, Jimmy. So are you gonna make the intelligent decision here and put yours truly in the World Title hunt, or am I just gonna have to force my way into it?

Cornette: "Christian Cage, I know how much you mean to this company and that's why yo-"

*Music hits*



*Abyss and Matt Morgan make their way out onto the ramp*

Morgan: "Now, Jim, I have no issue with you. But I hope you'll recognise that the pair of us deserve to be in any title tournament, whether it be for the Tag Team Championships or World Title. You owe me that in the least and I think my...er...buddy here, Abyss, would say the same."

*Abyss makes the title motion around his waist*

Cornette: (getting more annoyed) "Look, do I have to keep repeating myself? You're all in consideration for a shot at-"

*Music hits*



*Samoa Joe and A.J. Styles also make their way out, locking eyes with the MEM and trading insults from afar*

A.J. Styles: "...... Jim, you'd better not lower that glass ceiling and try to keep out the likes of me and Joe here. Not only do we signify the future of this company but we are the future of this industry. Not to mention I really wanna show those old folks over there that they really oughta be put in a home by now. Keep us out and well..... Joe WILL kill you."

*points to Joe who just nods quietly*

Cornette: (angrily) "RIGHT. I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS. YOU ALL WANT GLORY? YOU ALL WANT SUCCESS? WELL THIS IS HOW IT'S GONNA PAN OUT TONIGHT!!!!!!!"

*crowd pops for the passionate response*

Cornette: "Main Event Mafia. You wanna team up and earn some gold? You think you're the best team around? Well, you'll all get a chance to see how great your teamwork is. Because I'm giving you guys what you want - a chance to claim the Legends Championship. But....."

*Cornette smiles to himself*

Cornette: "....You won't be teaming up with each other - oh no. You see tonight's main event is a DOUBLE main event. TWO titles on the line in one match. Six teams, one Legends Title contender and one World Title contender on each team. This six-team tag match will be elimination only, meaning that the last remaining team will include our NEW Legends Champion and NEW World Champion. Now how does that sound?"

*Every superstar out on stage starts arguing and shouting at Cornette*

Cornette: "The teams are as follows:"

*Graphic appears on screen*

Booker T / Christian Cage
Kurt Angle / Samoa Joe
Sting / Abyss
Steiner / A.J.
Nash / Rhyno
/ Matt Morgan

Cornette: "As for the mystery Legend, he'll be showing up sometime soon. But until the match tonight, you'd better all start learning to get along because one thing I will NOT tolerate in the new WCTNA is being told how to run things. I stuck to my morals and it's about time some of you boys learnt some of your own."

*crowd pops again*

Cornette: "Now, I don't expect having to show my ugly mug again on this edition of iMPACT! So, the full matches for the evening will posted during the break - when afterwards, we kick things off with the X-Division Title match!"

*scene fades as all the superstars look at each other with suspicion and continue to argue amongst themselves*
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

I CANT BELIEVE THIS BULLS***!! DERZ NO WAY CORNETTE'S MAKIN ME TEAM UP WIDDAT VNILA MIDGET AJ STYLES!! IF AHM GONNA WIN DAT TEENAY TITLE, ISS GONNA BE ON MAH TERMS!! I AINT SHARIN NO GLORY WID ANYBODY WHO AINT IN THE MAYVINENT MAFIA!! CUZ THE MAINVENT MAFIA IS GONNA BRING HOME ALL THGOLD, WHETHER TEENAY MAJMENT LIKES IT OR NOT!!
____________________________________________________

Kurt Angle - starwolf013

You have got be freaking kidding me! This is ridiculous!

Kurt Angle appears visibly upset in the background as Jeremy Borash attempts an interview.

Kurt! Big news involving your match tonight as the TNA Heavyweight title and Legends Title will be decided in an elimination tag format. The big question is, how on earth will you possibly be able to get along with the Samoa Joe?

Enough JB, is this supposed to be a joke of somesort? I know Cornette wants everyone to play nicely but you stick me with Joe? How can that man possibly be reasoned with, JB?

Borash begins to answer but Kurt cuts him off.

That's right JB. He can't be reasoned with like a regular Joe. I'm going to need to find a way to get through to him.

An idea seems to dawn on Kurt's face. He smiles and walks off camera leaving Borash speechless.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

What, I have to work with the BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE! What is this bulls---!!!

Well, at least when I win that means I can slap the s--t out of them
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

(Backstage at the Main Event Mafia locker room)

Gentlemen, gentlemen! Listen to me! Are we going to let Jim Cornette get the best of us? Are we seriously going to let him try and destroy us like this? After tonight, it doesn't matter. Whoever this "mystery legend" is, we eliminate him and his partner, and at least one of those belts belongs to the Mafia. It can be you, Kurt. You, Booker. You, Kevin. Or you, Scotty. All that matters is that one of those titles is ours. And when we hold one, we all hold it. That's what family's all about.
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*Christian Cage and Christy Hemme hit the ring as Petey Williams is celebrating his victory.*

Hey, Main Event Mafia, would you look at that? We've got a champion, and you don't! And on behalf of all of us, and everyone smart enough to stand against you, I guarantee that it's going to be 3 champions by the end of the night...

...Which brings me to this. Booker T. Book, we've teamed in the past, and if memory serves we won. I don't like you, and you don't like me. And I sure as hell don't like giving the Mafia a championship. But tonight, let's just put our differences aside and work together to assure that by the end of the night, we're both champions.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy jumps into Petey's arms as he celebrates and screams with glee.

When Christy jumps down she detects SoCal Val sneaking up behind her, so she twirls around and slaps her in the face. As Val exits w/ Sonjay they stare each other down
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

WELL PEEDY WILLAMS, CONGRAJALTIONS. YOU JUSS BEAT A BUNCH OF FLIPPY DIPPY 150-POUND JABRONIS. A BUNCH OF GUYS THAT DONT EVEN OUTWEIGH ME SOAKIN WET. SO YOU GO AND YOU CEB-CELEBRATE YOUR ACTIVISHON TITLE, AN I'LL BE COSATRATIN ON THE BIG MONEY, THE TEENAY WURL HEVAWEIGHT CHAMPISHIP!!
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

Abyss... Chris, we've certainly had our history together. Both good times and bad. But if I remember right, we've been on good terms. Now, I know you're not going to like the idea of going up against Matt Morgan in the main event. But listen to me, Chris. Out of everyone in that ring, we need to eliminate Matt and his partner. I know he's your friend, but he and whoever his partner are represent the biggest threat to you becoming TNA World Champion. Do you understand me?
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

*petey continues to pose with the belt*

The Definition of Definition baby!
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy looks a bit pissed that Petey has completely ignored her confrontation with Val and gives him the stinkeye

;D
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*Christian Cage looks even more pissed that everyone seems to have forgotten about his congratulations to Petey Williams and declarations of later victory for both himself and Christy Hemme, not to mention his calling out of Booker T.*


____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy enters still a bit pissed at having to team with the b***ch squad
____________________________________________________

Kurt Angle - starwolf013

Outside of Samoa Joe's Locker Room, we find Kurt Angle with an envelope in his hand rapping on the door.

Hey Joe. Joe!

No answer

Listen, you don't want to talk to me face to face? That's fine. I know that you are not very fond of me after I've beaten you in the center of the ring on multiple occasions, but I want to put all of that behind us for one night.

And with this being the season of giving I have brought you a token of good faith from the family.

Kurt smiles broadly as he boasts.

What I have in my hands Joe is something I know that you will enjoy. This is a fifty dollar gift certificate for food from Bahama Breeze. I figured they would have whatever pineapple, coconut, seafood special that you Samoans love to feast on. They may even have some of those fire twirling ladies you like so much.

Let's get to the finals, and you can get the Legends belt (for now) and you can have yourself a nice Samoan styled feast afterwards.

Still no answer.

That's ok Joe, I'll just leave this under the door.
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

*Backstage Awesome Kong is getting in Cornette's face*

Cornette: (worried) ".....crap.... I'm sorry, I thought the ref counted correctly. I'll see to it that...*GULP*.... the decision is reversed here tonight!"

*Kong nods silently*

Cornette: "But in the interests of fairness, I am going to make another Battle Royal, like with the X Division title - only this time - six women - the same six from earlier. And it WILL be for the Women's Championship, ok? And it will be coming up shortly!"
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy Hemme shrieks in anger at the decision reversal
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette (Iron Giant) & The James Gang

*Backstage, Jim Cornette is tending to various members of staff. Suddenly from nowhere, BG James and “Cute” Kip James grab the Management Director and get his attention*

BG James: “Yo Cornette. Where the hell are we on the card tonight? Huh? Why us two as well, what do you think you’re playing at?”

*Cornette is taken aback*

Cornette: “Wh…what?”

Cute Kip: “This is bullcrap Cornette – we’re stars in our own right. At the moment we don’t see eye-to-eye but we both agree on one thing. You got something going on with us two, ain’t ya?!”

Cornette: “HEY! I have nothing against such a fine pair of guys like you two. We only had a certain number of slots I was allowed to fill and-“

*The two James boys get angry*

BG James: “NOT ALLOWED TO FILL? THEN MAKE SPACE FOR US!”

Cute Kip: “You better do as he says cos he’s gets real ang-“

Cornette: (now annoyed himself) “LOOK – if you got a problem with the company take it up with the Senior Management, someone like Jarrett. I just book the shows, I don’t decide how many slots I got or for how long. This ain’t my problem gentlemen, so I suggest you seek your answers elsewhere! OKAY?!”

*The two look at each then back at Cornette*

BG James: “Oh – we got what we need – let’s go get some “answers”……”

*The two walk off sullenly, obviously plotting something…*
____________________________________________________

Homicide - The Tank

Dawg, I'll tell ya who da punk-ass biatches from Motown are facin' in da next match: SuperMex and Tha Notorious 187, son! LAX! LAX! ARRIBA LA RAZA! BRRRRAH! BRRRRAH!
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

This Isnt Fair To Christy!!!!

Did you see this cage?
____________________________________________________

Hernandez - Sajoa Patrick

*silently makes "LAX" hand gesture, followed by cutthroat*
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Damn right it isn't!!! DAMN RIGHT IT ISN'T
____________________________________________________

Homicide - The Tank

*Homicide and Hernandez are handed the TNA World Tag Team Championships.*

YEA! YEA! WHAT'D I SAY? I CALLED THAT S***, BIG MAN! WE DA CHAMPS, AND THEY NOTHIN', SON! NOTHIN'!!!

YOU F*** WIT DA LATINO NATION, YOU GO DOWN, SON! BRRRAH! BRRRAH!
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Rhino, I hope you're ready. Because you're doing most of the work out there. Not because I'm hurt or anything. I just ate, and my doctor told me I should always wait 30 minutes after eating before I go swimming.

Mr. Nash, you're not going swimming.

I'm not?!

No, you're about to go wrestle.

Me wrestle? HAHA! That's a good one!

*Nash walks toward the ring... wearing a pair of swim trunks*
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*Christian Cage suddenly takes a steel chair and starts assaulting Sting and Booker T! He then goes to Abyss and.....drops the steel chair. Cage gets right in Abyss's face and mouths 5 simple words before leaving: I want a title match.*
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

Wait a minute! Here comes Steiner with the lead pipe! With Abyss' back turned, Steiner slams the pipe over Abyss' head!
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

Stings gets up from his assault and gets his new Championship belt, helping Booker T up. He then walks over to Abyss and in a sign of respect, extends his hand to his tag-team partner.

After the lead pipe attack, Sting does nothing, neither helping Steiner beat down Abyss nor helping Abyss fend off the assault. He just watches, mixed emotions on his face.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy Hemme runs out to support and jumps Sharmell, sending her into the steel steps!
____________________________________________________

Mike Tenay & Don West - Iron Giant

Tenay: "WHAT A SHOW! WE HAVE NEW CHAMPIONS TO MARK THE BEGINNIG OF A NEW ERA! ABYSS AND STING!"

West: "I'M SPEECHLESS! WHAT A MATCH! WHAT A NIGHT!"

Tenay: "I'm getting word next week there will be a formal celebration for all of the new champions at iMPACT! next week! Until then, savour this moment people for you have witnessed history tonight!"

WCTNA Impact Ends

[Title Master Mikey]

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***

Jim Cornette has announced that next week, Christian Cage and Booker T will square off in a no.1 contenders match for the World Title.

The winner will face Abyss at the next PPV for the belt.
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***
Also announced for next week, WCTNA Champion Abyss will take on Scott Steiner in a non-title matchup.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Hey, Scotty! Whatta ya say you and me team up and take OUR Tag Team Titles from the LAX?!

And Rhino? It's YOUR fault that we lost! Cornette, I am DEMANDING a match with Rhino! And I'm going to sit here and drink beer and read comic books until I get it!

*Sits down at Cornette's desk and pulls out a cooler and a stack of comics*
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

That's fine. It's because of Booker's lazy ass anyways that we lost anyways. Next week, he's gonna go down in no time at all. And Abyss...good luck until the PPV. It'd be a damn shame if the Main Event Mafia took you down before the PPV. So, if they make a move against you...you know who to call.
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

Y'KNOW NAASH, SMUCH AS I WOULD LIKE TO TEAM UP WITCHOO AN TAKE DOES TEENAY TAG TEAM TITLES WAY FRUM DOSE SWEATY MEXICAN PUNKS, WE AINT GONNA WIN BY READIN COMIC BOOKS AN DRINKIN BEERS! YOUMEE, WE GOTTA HIT DA GYM, CUZ DATS WHERE DA BIG BAAAAD BOODAY DADDEH SPEDNS HIS FREE TIME WHEN HE AINT DOIN DA BUMP N GRYNE AT HIS HOTEL ROOM! DA MAYVENT MAFIA, WE AINT SPOSTA BE LIKE DEM YOUNG KNOW-NOTHINS WHO SPEN ALL THEIR FREE TIME PLAYIN VIDYO GAMES AN DRINKIN FRESCA, WEN DEY SHUD BE TRAININ THEIR ASS OFF, AN YA DONT SHOW NO RESPECT TO DA BIZISS BY PLAYIN VIDYO GAMES!
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

I was screwed by a bad ref, I would have obliterated the Beautiful People and almost defeated Kong too! I deserve another shot at the woman's title, and this time I want noone to distract me from Kong, so it has to be one on ONE!

And I also want a chance to wrestle Sharmell one on one too!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***
Another match has been signed for next week's iMPACT taping. Kevin Nash will take on "The War Machine" Rhino!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***
Yet another match has been added to next week's card. X-Division Champion Petey Williams and Women's Champion Awesome Kong will face Christy Hemme and an X-Division partner of her choosing in a non-title intergender tag team match!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***
Jim Cornette has announced that the previous WCTNA Match Announcer has been released and wished well on future endeavours.

Meanwhile, next week, Christy Hemme and Petey Williams will take on Awesome Kong and an X-Division partner of her choosing in an intergender non-title match.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Yeah! That's what I'm talking abooouttttttt[/color]
____________________________________________________

Sting -M.O.P

(With the rest of the Mafia)

Well, gentlemen. The WCTNA Legends Championship is where it belongs, with the true legends of this business: the Main Event Mafia. I say this calls for a celebration![/color] (gets a bottle of expensive champagne and motions to some glasses on the table)
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Well then, tomorrow, I'm leavin' the comic books and the beer at home! I'll be wearin' sweats and chuggin' bottles of vitamin water! Because, Scotty?! Tomorrow, you and I, we're hittin' the gym!
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

see that Christy lets prove Cornette that you were robbed of the title on impact and why you are the rightful champ, plus i wouldnt hurt to show the rest of the x-division why I am THE DEFINITION OF DEFINITION
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

And The Champ will be accompanying the rest of The Coalition to ringside. Why, you ask? I've got my reasons.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

I totally agree Petey, let's go take care of bussiness and show them why the coalition should have all the titles in TNA...

Once we get a tag team...

And a legend
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

I'm happy the TNA Legends Title is within the family and I guarantee once I defeat the leada of the coalition Booka T will go on to defeat the monsta Abyss and I shall celebrate with my queen and family.
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***

Also announced for next week:

MEM members Kurt Angle and Legends Champion Sting will take on Samoa Joe and A.J. Styles in a tag match!

The Motor City Machine Guns will be paired with Curry Man and Shark Boy against the combined team of Team 3D and Beer Money in 4-on-4 Tag Team Match. The person who scores the pinfall for their team ensures they will become no. 1 contenders for the WCTNA Tag Team Championships.

We will also have an update on the condition of WCTNA Vice-Chairman Jeff Jarrett, who was cruelly denied a return to the ring by the savage attack from BG and Kip James before his match on iMPACT!

Finally, we'll have the first round of an X-Division tournament to decide a new no. 1 contender to the WCTNA X-Division Title.
____________________________________________________

Chris Sabin - chiefdom

*Sabin side kicks a random guy in the back with an LAX shirt on*
____________________________________________________

Homicide - The Tank

*Homicide Pearl Harbors Chris Sabin with his World Tag Team Championship.*

Ya don't f*** wit da Latino Nation, white boi! Uh uh!

*Homicide gets right in Sabin's face after a few stomps to the downed Motor City Machinegun.*

You want dese Tag Titles, dawg? Den you just gon have t' earn da shot like da rest of da gringos. Den you gon find out why dey call me Notorious 187. Arriba la raza, bitch. To live and die...in LAX.
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***

The MCMGs are no longer in the no. 1 contenders match for the Tag-Team Titles at the next PPV.

Instead next Tuesday, it will be the Latin American Exchange v the Motor City Machine Guns for the WCTNA Tag Team Championships!

They will be replaced in the no. 1 contenders match by the Rock 'n' Rave Infection.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

OK, hold the phone! I'm seeing a serious lack of the Main Event Mafia in the Tag Title picture! Why're you leavin' us out?! We're just as good as any of the other teams in that match! In fact, we're BETTER! Cornette, I think you might wanna rethink that decision!

Now if you'll excuse me, Scotty's waitin' for me at the gym!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

"You both requested one-on-one matches for the next iMPACT! taping and I honoured that request. The ink has dried on the papers and I ain't tip-exing nothing out! BUT as I preach fairness, if BOTH you AND Steiner win your singles matches this Tuesday on iMPACT! then I'll consider the pair of you as no. 2 contenders to the Tag Team Titles! Of course, whoever wins on Tuesday in the no. 1 contenders match will be first in line for a shot but I guarantee you'll be next - that's if you both win. Satisfied?"[/b][/color]
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Only thing is... win and you're champions. Lose... and you're to the back of the queue, I'm afraid.
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

On a side note, the card is pretty full right now - I'll accept ONE more singles match, preferably involving Knockouts / X-Division competitors.

If not, I'll add another round to the X-Division tournament.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

*Nash is at the gym, using one of those medicine balls*

So, basically, Scotty and me, we need to win 2 seperate singles matches to get a shot at the TAG TEAM titles? Welcome to TNA.
____________________________________________________

Homicide - The Tank

Yea, yea, go ahead and git yo shot. Don't matter anyways, cuz ya step wit us, ya gon lose, ya ol' bastard.
____________________________________________________

Brother Ray - TTS

*Brother Ray is shown watching ''The George Lopez Show'' backstage*

*turns to camera*

Not everything that happens backstage is interestin ya'know
____________________________________________________

Random Intern - The Tank

*Random backstage guy runs into the locker room and sprays Brother Ray with silly string.*

Hee hee hee!!!

*Random backstage guy runs away giggling like a little girl.*
____________________________________________________

Brother Ray - TTS

*Brother Ray flags down Scott Steiner*
That guy said you don't know Math

*Changes TV to ''Happy Days''*
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner (Sajoa Patrick) & Kevin Nash (Evil M)

Mike Tenay: Scott Steiner said that he was going to make sure that Kevin Nash was in top condition for next week's edition of Impact! Let's see how their training session is doing!

(A high-profile gym in Orlando.)

Steiner: NOW IF WE'RE GONNA BEAT THOSE NO-NAME MEXICAN REJECTS AND TAKE THOSE TAG TEAM TITLES, WE GOTTA START PUMPIN' IRON! I'M GONNA HIT THE BENCH AND SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE!

Nash: Come on, Scotty. Everybody knows I was the World Bench Press Champion of 1987. I could easily press over 700 pounds.

Steiner: OH, YOU KNOW HOW IT'S DONE? OKAY, YOU START IT OFF! GET UNDER THERE AND SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!

Nash: Nah, I wouldn't wanna show you up. You get it started and I'll watch.

(Steiner puts 400 pounds on the bench, and starts pumping rhythmically. Meanwhile, Nash is lying on an opposite bench, moving a Magic Eye book towards and away from his eyes in rhythm with Steiner.)

Nash: Oh look, a sailboat.

(Steiner reaches ten presses, but struggles to get the barbell back up.)

Steiner: SPOT! SPOT!

(Nash comes over and lifts the barbell off Steiner's chest.)

Nash: Now that was pretty impressive. You may just beat my record yet.

(Part 2 to follow)

(Cut back to the Impact Zone)
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner (Sajoa Patrick) & Kevin Nash (Evil M)

Mike Tenay: Let's head back to the gym, where Scott Steiner and Kevin Nash continue their training session!

(Cut back to the gym)

(Steiner is sitting on a bench, doing curls with a huge dumbbell.)

Steiner: *oof* 48... *oof* 49... *oof* 50! (puts down dumbbell) THAT'S FIFTY, NASH! WHAT'RE YOU UP TO?

(Nash, instead of doing curls, is eating a hoagie.)

Nash: About 2000 calories, I think. I like extra mayo.

Steiner: WILLYA PUT TH'DAMN SAMMICH DOWN, NASH!! WE GOTTA GET PUMPED UP AND YOU AINT DOIN NOTHIN!!

Nash: Hey, Scotty, calm down. You've been working too hard. All that adrenaline is going to your head. You need to sit back, relax, (pulls out his cooler, opens it), and have a brewski.

Steiner: OKAY, FINE. ONE BEER. BUT THEN IT'S RIGHT BACK TO PUMPIN!!

(Part 3 to follow)

(Cut back to Impact Zone)
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner (Sajoa Patrick), Kevin Nash (Evil M), Chris Sabin (chiefdom) & Alex Shelley

Mike Tenay: I have just received word that Scott Steiner and Kevin Nash have left the gym! Let's catch up with them!

(Cut to the outside of a karaoke bar, night. The camera goes inside the bar to find Nash and Steiner, obviously drunk, leaning on each other to stay on their feet, and singing badly.)

Steiner and Nash:

CAT SCRATCH FEE-VUR!! DUH NUH DUHHH!!
CAT SCRATCH FEE-VUR!! DOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOWW!!

(Quick cut to end of the song. Nash is doing air guitar and jumping around, almost losing his balance and falling on Steiner.)

Steiner: HOL UP KEVN! YOU HAD TOO MUCH T'DRINK ALREADY! SETTLE DOWN!

Karaoke MC: That was Kevin and Scott, gettin' a little Cat Scratch Fever tonight! Okay, up next we've got Chris and Alex, come on up!

(Steiner and Nash stumble back to their table, laughing the whole way. As they seat themselves and order more beers, Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin get up on the stage.)

Shelley: We'd like to dedicate this song to a very special lady, who may or may not be in the audience tonight.

Sabin: We love you, Kelly Ripa!

Shelley:

Where it began
I can't begin to know when
But then I know it's growing strong

Sabin:

Wasn't the spring
Then spring became the summer
Who would believe you'd come along

Shelley:

Hands...

Sabin:

Touching hands...

Shelley:

Reachin' out

Shelley and Sabin:

Touchin' me
Touchin' yooooouuuuu...

OH, SWEET CAROLINE (BUM BUM BUUUMM)
GOOD TIMES NEVER SEEMED SO GOOD (SO GOOD! SO GOOD! SO GOOD!)
I'VE BEEN INCLINED (BUM BUM BUUUMM)
TO BELIEVE THEY NEVER WOULD
AND NOW I...

(Just then, Steiner stands up to yell at the Motor City Machine Guns.)

Steiner: JUSS WADDYOO TINK YER DOIN HERE?! YOU THINK YOU GOT DA BAWLS T'COME IN HERE, THINKIN' YER BETTERN US, AND YOU GOT DA BAWLS TO...

Nash: C'mooonnn, Shhcotty. They ain't hurning nobody. Let 'em finish the shhhlong.

Steiner: I DON'T GIVE A CRAP!! DIS HERE'S DA MAYNVENT MAFIA TERRTORY, AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF ANNBODY WALKS ON OUR TURF!!

Nash: Okay Scotty, you've had enough. (motions to waiter) Check please.
____________________________________________________

Jay Lethal - Brahma Bull

Hi I'm Jay Lethal, I like beans and such
____________________________________________________

Homicide - The Tank

Don't know whatchu tryin' to git at dere, son.......but I ain't interested.[/color]
____________________________________________________

[Title Master Mikey]

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

The following promo should be visualized with Creed doing random poses, flips, and splits

Hey hey! Look here! My name is Consequences Creed and it's time to faaaaccccccccceee the Consequences.[/color]
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Oi Cornnet! I thought I asked for a match again Sharmell too? Sure, Kong has my belt right now so she's my number one target, but that doesn't mean I don't want to slap the b***h out of her royal highness![/color]
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

You can have her on the next iMPACT! taping, on the 23rd December.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

*Nash and Steiner are in the MEM's locker room*

You know somethin' Scotty? I can't believe Cornette allowed those two broads to be in the Tag Title Contender's match. What was he thinkin'?! Besides, The Beautiful People? What makes them more beautiful than us?

*Nash ponders this for a few minutes as Steiner rants incoherently*(OOC: There's no way I can do Steiner justice, so I'm leaving that to Sajoa Moe)

Hold on Scotty! I got it! The perfect way to prove we're more beautiful than the beautiful people! Angelina, Velvet, we challenge you to a beauty contest!
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

*Sting walks into the MEM locker room.*

Gentlemen. (nods to the other MEM members) So, Scotty, Kevin. You're going to take on The Beautiful People in a beauty contest? Did I hear that right? Well, no offense guys, but you have your work cut out for you.

And Kurt, it seems like our opponents have been changed for next week's tag match.(turns to camera) Chris, we may have been partners last week. And I do respect you and the hard work we both went through to become WCTNA World and Legends Champions. However, I'm not holding anything back at our match next week. And I don't expect you to, either. While I have nothing personal against you, business is business. And the Main Event Mafia's business is bringing that World Championship back to the Family.
____________________________________________________

Velvet Sky - Evil M

So, Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner have challenged us to a Beauty Contest? US?! Boys, if you honestly think you're as Beautiful as us, then you need to get your eyes checked! But we will accept your challenge, isn't that right, Angelina?
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme & Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

This... will be rather entertaining[/color]

Splits

You said it...[/i]

Dramatic pause with random boxing moves

Christy![/i]
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

YOU OUTCHER DAMN MIND, NAASH?! YOU KIN PRANCE AROUN INNA TUBE TOP N A THON ALL YOU WANT, BUT BIG POPPA PUMP DONT DOOO BEAUTY CONTESS!! HE ONLY DOES THE CHICKS WHATS IN THE BEAUTY CONTESS!! IF YOU WANNA WASTE YER TYYME WIDDA BEAUTY CONTESS, DASS FINE W'ME!! BUT I AINT GONNA BE HAULIN YER ASS ROUND TH-RING WHEN IT COMES TIME TO WIN THAT NUMMER ONE COTENNER MATCH!!

BOOFUL PEOPLE!! I ANT DA TYPE WHO WOULD WANNA SMACK AROUN A PRETTY LADY, BUFFYOO GEDDIN MY WAY, YOU BEAR BE REDDY FER FIGHT!! AN IF YOU WANT SASSFASHIN, ALL YOU GOTTA DOO, IZ COME ROUN TO MAH LOCKER ROOM AN I'LL MAKE IT SO YOU WON EVEN BE ABLE TO WALK TO TH'RING!! CUZ WHEN I GO BEHYNE, AN DO DA BUMP N GRYNE, S'ONLY A MADDERA TYME, AN SASSFASHIN'S COMIN FRUM A JNENIC FREAK!!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***

On the iMPACT! taping for the 23rd December, Management Director Jim Cornette has announced that there will be a "Christmas Cracker Costume Contest" involving the WCTNA Knockouts, Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner.

The winners of the contest (which will be held by means of a vote) will be rewarded with a photoshoot for the January edition of the WCTNA Magazine.[/color]
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

OH GREAT NASH! LOOKIT WHAT YOU GOT US INTO NOW!!
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Well Scotty, you know what this means? We're gettin' makeovers!
____________________________________________________

Abyss - Amigo

Hurrgggggggg............................................
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

Mike Tenay: Up next, a video of a most unusual competitor.

*The feed turns from in the IMPACT Zone, and into a Buddist Temple in Kyoto, Japan. ( OOC: www.youtube.com/watch?v=truk7KTrDbg )There are torches set up in a circle, surrounding a crude Wooden structure. Buddist Monks, tattoed head-to-toe in Kanji, eyes completly white as if they are in trances are on Ceremonial Drums. A lead Monk clad in Blood Red robes takes a torch with Blue fire on it. He leads a chant of the monks in Japanese. "Kiyoshi" is the start of the chant, but none of our staff can translate the full chant. The chant goes on with increasing fury, as the fire starts to rage, and a thunder storm starts. It reaches the boiling point as Lightning hits the Wooden structure, as a low, guttural sound emerges from within. The feed then turns to a black screen as Kanji appear with the words "Kiyoshi Has Awakend" typed underneath with a strange laugh is heard. (OOC: See the video for what the voice sounds like)*
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Screen backs out to D-Von and Ray sitting on a couch watching TV*

Ray:This Show sucks

D-Von:Change it

*clicks remote*

Ray:It Won't Change

D-Von: Aw well
____________________________________________________

Chris The Intern - The Tank

*Chris the Random TNA Intern runs into the scene and throws a donut at Brother Ray, then runs away giggling.*
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

*Kevin Nash is seen getting a facial*

Ah, now THIS, this is the life. Scotty, you sure you don't wanna go next? It's really relaxin'.
____________________________________________________

Chris the Intern - The Tank

*Chris the Random TNA Intern runs in and screws up Kevin Nash's makeup, then runs away giggling.*
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*As he runs out the door he runs into Team 3D waiting for him in the parking lot*

Ray:THIS IS FOR WASTING DONUTS

*3Ds thru Alex Shelly's Jeep*

Ray:Whoops hope that didn't belong to anyone important

*They then load him into a crate and slap a ''SHIP TO CZW'' sticker on it*

Ray:Lets see him pull that there
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Facing away, turns around, does a split, bounces up, does some random punches

I

Jab Jab

can't wait

Split

to be

Jab jab

X Division

Split

champion

Kick

Petey!

Jab Jab

we may

Split

be somewhat

Kick, Jab Jab

friendly

Split

but I'm comin'

Jab Jab, points to the camera

for ya!
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

*Lightning hits Team 3D's TV out of nowhere. The strange, eerie laughter is heard again*#
____________________________________________________

16th December, 2008 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant



***Cut to ring where Management Director Jim Cornette is standing by***



Cornette: "Welcome one and all to WCTNA Impact! I'd first of all like to make a few announcements and then leave you all to enjoy what promises to be a fantastic show tonight!"

*crowd pops slightly*

Cornette: "The Semi-Final match-ups for the WCTNA X-Division No.1 Contender's Tournament will both occur next week not this week as originally scheduled."

*crowd murmurs with disapproval*

Cornette: "Sorry folks but when you see the contestants involved, you'll understand why we have to wait for what promises to be an exciting event. My next announcement involves Jeff Jarrett."

*crowd cheers*

Cornette: "Last week, he was brutally attacked by Kip and BG James prior to his match in the Double Main Event. Not only did this deny him a shot at gold, it's also put him out of action indefinitely. The fact that he was taken out because they blamed him for their non-appearance on last week's card is both sickening and worrying. However, their non-appearance will continue indefinitely because I took it upon myself to suspend them both without pay. So guys, I hope you realise that this is not the way we will run things here in WCTNA. I hope every competitor realises that vicious assaults and pestering requests will be treated as such and that anyone guilty of such acts WILL be punished. Any problems should be addressed to me and me alone."

*crowd agrees*

Cornette: "Now, that's the dirty work over with. Let's get this show on the road."

*Cut to commercial*
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette (Iron Giant) & Awesome Kong (The Tank)

Tenay: "What a match and welcome back - we have some footage to show you now of a meeting that took place earlier this week. Roll the film, guys."

*Awesome Kong suddenly enters Jim Cornette's office while he is doing contract paperwork-type things. Conspicuously absent is Raisha Saeed. Cornette is taken back a little in surprise*

.....Hello.....er....Kong..... what can I do for you?

*Cornette takes a slightly defensive posture as Kong stands close to him.*

Mr. Cornette, I'd.........

*Cornette is stunned as Kong starts speaking.*

....wow.......*cough*.........Look, if it's about the refereeing error on the premiere edition of Impact, I righted that wrong straight away! And besides, you got what you wanted - you became our Inaugral WCTNA Women's Champion and-

*Kong puts her hand up to stop Cornette talking.*

Jim, this isn't about the championship or about the refereeing error. And don't get me wrong, I'm honored to be the first champion, and I'm honored to hold this title again. But, I do have a problem regarding my competition in the Knockout's division.

*Cornette ponders for a moment.*

Well, first of all let me reassure you that I will be finalising the issue of a number one contender for your title in the near future. However, tonight, you have an Intergender Tag Team match against Christy Hemme and Petey Williams. And if memory serves, you still need to choose a tag team partner for the match.

*Cornette looks closely at Kong, waiting for an answer.*

Mr. Cornette, that's exactly the problem. Personally, against Christy Hemme and Petey Williams, I don't believe I need a partner. I am more than capable of wrestling the men in this company. But, if I have to have a partner for this match, then I'll have a partner - if it's really that important.

*Cornette smiles briefly.*

Ok, this Tuesday - pick your partner and have your match. You want competition - well I'm gonna allow you to decide what level of competition you desire because the partner you choose will be your opponent next week in WCTNA's first-ever Battle of the Sexes match! Now, are you satisfied?

*Cornette looks pleased with himself as he awaits Kong's response.*

.........deal.

*Awesome Kong exits Jim Cornette's office.*

***Cut back to broadcast***
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

So Awesome Kong is still running around thinking she's better than everyone else around here because she's fat huh?

And Jimmy, I left the Rock n' Rave infection because I was tired of just following you around and seducing superheroes so you can win matches. You selfish punk. Remember when Angle beat the s**t out of you and I got attacked by the beautiful people while desperately rushing to the hospital?[/b]
____________________________________________________

Angelina Love (Brahma Bull), Velvet Sky, Kevin Nash (Evil M), Scott Steiner (Sajoa Patrick) & Kiyoshi (Amigo)

*Music hits*



*Velvet Sky and Angelina Love make their way to the ring, mics in hand*

Sky: "For those of you who don't know - and you must be blind or well... not a true man.... - for those of you who don't know we are the finest, sexiest pair of athletes on the whole WCTNA roster. We call ourselves the Beautiful People for a reason."

Love: "Why? Because as Kurt Angle would say, "it's damn true!", we are just.... gorgeous!"

*Both eye each other and nod agreeingly*

Sky: "But we ain't just a pair of bimbo divas looking for a free ride in this industry. We want to prove that we can hang with the so-called big boys... the 'men' of this company. So we wanted in on this Tag Team Contender's Match to not only prove a point but to make history as the first all-female Tag Team Champions in American History!"

Love: "....And speaking of 'men', I don't know what Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner think they're playing at trying to compete in a beauty contest and especially against us. I think you the audience will thank us when we give them the paper bag treatment and prevent you fr-"

*Music hits*



*Nash and Steiner appear on the stage*

Nash: "Y'know, for years they've been calling me 'Big Sexy' and him the 'Big Booty Daddy'. For a couple of months, they've been calling you a pair of whores. Am I right Scotty?"

Steiner: "YCAN ALL SEEWHY DEY CAWLME DEJYNETIC FREEEEEK BECOS IM THE SEXYEST, DA BIGGEST AND DA FRESHEST MAN ON DA ROSTA, YHEARME? DEY DONT WANNA KNOWBOUT A CUPPLE OF PROS DEY WANNA KNOWBOUT A CUPPLE OF STUDDS! E NEXT WEEK, WEELSHOWEM WHY! ASFUR DIS WEEK, YOU BITCHAS NEDAGOOD SPANKIN' FROMA HUKUP."

*The two teams smile at each other as we cut back to the commentary booth*

Tenay: "No.1 Contender's match for the tag titles - up next on iMPACT! But before then, we have a video of a most unusual competitor."

*The following music plays accompanying the video*



*The feed turns from in the IMPACT Zone, and into a Buddist Temple in Kyoto, Japan. There are torches set up in a circle, surrounding a crude Wooden structure. Buddist Monks, tattoed head-to-toe in Kanji, eyes completly white as if they are in trances are on Ceremonial Drums. A lead Monk clad in Blood Red robes takes a torch with Blue fire on it. He leads a chant of the monks in Japanese. "Kioshi" is the start of the chant, but none of our staff can translate the full chant. The chant goes on with increasing fury, as the fire starts to rage, and a thunder storm starts. It reaches the boiling point as Lightning hits the Wooden structure, as a low, guttural sound emerges from within. The feed then turns to a black screen as Kanji appear with the words "Kioshi Has Awakend" typed underneath with a strange laugh is heard.*


*Cut to Commercial - next match up in two minutes*
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy jumps up and grabs a mike

Look, you beat me fair and square Kong, this time, but I'm announcing now that I want to face the winner of the battle of the sexes match one-on-one. Yes, that's right Kong, you're not the only one here willing to face a man in the ring. I want a chance to beat up Jimmy, if he wins, and I want a chance to beat Kong with noone else but me and her in the ring. I got Sharmell to face next week, but the Impact! after that I want a one-on-one match with the winner of the battle of the sexes match!

WCTNA Impact Ends

[Title Master Mikey]

Sting (M.O.P) & Kurt Angle (starwolf013)

(Backstage after the show)

Scott Steiner, Kurt Angle, and Kevin Nash all ambush Christian Cage and start mercilessly beating him down, Booker T joining in soon after. Sting enters casually, signature black baseball bat in hand. Steiner and Nash hold up Christian's half-conscious body.

This is for last week, Christian! Sting whacks Cage with the bat, and then grabs him and delivers a Scorpion Death Drop onto the concrete.

Angle: Good luck with your title match, champ. Angle gives Christian's battered body a kick to the gut for good measure as the Mafia leave.
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

Booker: REE-SPECT!
____________________________________________________

Rhino - Perpetual Nirvana

*Exclusive aftershow footage shows Rhino watching The Coalition celebrate from the entrance*
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy rushes in

Christian! Christian

D***it! F***ing Main Even Mafia D**kheads!

I swear, Sharmell will feel insane amounts of pain next week when I beat her mercilessly for this[/color]
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

*As the Mafia leaves to thier Limo, they find that it is on fire*
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

Petey, Christian and Christy are seen backstage talking about Rhino
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Team 3D is making Smores*

Ray:Bout time you guys got here

D-Von:We been here since our match

Ray:Anywho we wanted to join your little group there

D-von:Do we have to supply our own suits?

Ray:Me and D could use some new Duds

*D-von walks over to Booker and holds up a Smore*

D-von: want one?
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA ANNOUNCEMENT***



Wrestlecrap Total Non-stop Action would like to wish Management Director Jim Cornette a very happy birthday for the 18th of December.

Cornette will be 26.
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Team 3D expects Cake
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

You would, you fat traitorus slobs. At least the other Has Been Mafia-tards are in shape, artificially sure, but in shape.[/color]
____________________________________________________

Sting & Jay Lethal (M.O.P)

Happy birthday, Jim! You and I go way back, so here's a present from all of us in the Main Event Mafia.[/b] *gives Jim a bottle of Dom Perignon*

Brother Ray, Brother D-Von. If you two were not being facetious about joining our family and getting the respect[/b] (Booker goes "REE-SPECT!") you deserve from the rest of these ingrates as one of the greatest tag-teams ever, then we'll need to put it to a vote, but I'm sure you'd be welcome in with open arms.

(elsewhere in the Impact Zone)

OOOOOOH YEAAAAAAAH! This is "Black Machismo," Jay Lethal! I haven't been too active in the IMPACT ZOOOONE-AH yet, yeah! But I'm PUTTIN IN' notice to Jim Cornette and see if I can get myself a match!
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

*a slightly tipsy Jim Cornette, with bottle of Dom Perignon in hand, stumbles into Jay Lethal*

Cornette: "...mmmm....heeeeeey Jay."

Lethal: "Hey Jim, I thought your birthday wasn't until tomorrow?"

Cornette: (thinks for a second) ".....slr.....it is....not..... you're right.... *hic*......but I thought it besssth to start early! Hahaha!"

*laughs to himself as Lethal looks on bemused*

Cornette: "But ifffs I reeeeeeecall, you - yes, you - asked for a match. Soooooooo..... *burp* ..... you are....o..off....offishall....offishalleeeeeee entered into the numba ONE....*hic*..... contenderzzzz tournament for....the X Deeevision title. Ok, MATE?"

*Lethal nods in approval*

Cornette: "Now...............I needz a kebab........... see ya later, Dave."

*Cornette stumbles off in search of food*
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Backflip

Wait Jim!

Jab jab

what about

Kick, split

the one and only

Jab jab

Consequences creed!
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:Who the Hell is That?

D-von:*Shrugs*
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

D-von:When do we tell him thats Non-Alcoholic Champagne?

Ray:When he finishes Peeing in The Punch
Let him have his Moment
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Attacked from Behind*
D-von:*Hits with Trashcan*
Ray
*Trashcan Shot
whats
*Trashcan shot*
this
*Trashcan shot*
guy's
*Trashcan shot*
Name
*Trashcan shot*
again?

Ray:*Hits with Cane*
I
*Cane Shot*
Think
*Cane Shot*
it's
*Cane Shot*
Jay
*Cane Shot*
Somethin
*Cane Shot*
Who
*Cane Shot*
cares
*Cane Shot*
Anyhow

D-von:*Now has Chair*
Think
*Chairshot*
This
*Chairshot*
will
*Chairshot*
get
*Chairshot*
us
*Chairshot*
in
*Chairshot*
the
*Chairshot*
Mafia?
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

So, what do you say guys? All for letting Team 3D join us? I vote 'Yes."
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Well, we do need guys to fetch us sandwiches- er, I mean, we do need an experienced tag team in the ranks. So I say 'Yes.'
____________________________________________________

Booker T & Angelina Love - Brahma Bull

Sure. Tell Devon to get mah coffee and show me some REE-SPECT!!!

*then Angelina Love strips to bring activity to the thread.*
____________________________________________________

Brother Ray - TTS

Brother Ray isn't impressed
____________________________________________________

Velvet Sky - Evil M

*Velvet Sky joins in the stripping*
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

*averts his eyes being the Christian family man he is*

Well, unless Kurt or Scotty have any serious objections, welcome to the Family! Your suits will be provided from the finest designers and will be delivered to your homes in two-four weeks.
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Creed suffers in silence









Jab jab
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*D-von moves to say something but is stopped by Ray who shakes his Head*
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

D-Von:You want to load him into a crate like

Ray:OH MY GOD THE INTERN'S STILL IN THE CRATE

D-Von:WHAT?!?!? YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO LET HIM OUT AFTER A COUPLA HOURS

Ray:I THOUGHT WE WERE ACTUALLY GOING TO SHIP HIM

D-Von:WHAT?!??!!? HOW THE HELL WERE WE GONNA DO THAT??
HOW LONG'S HE BEEN IN THERE

Ray:LET SEE ITS BEEN
*Counts on Fingers*
Yep he's dead

D-Von:What do we do with him?

Ray:Wanna ship him to OVW??

D-Von:why not
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Muffled

I could use some SERIOUS rescuing right now...[/color]
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

Hey, I may be the boss but I'm so hungover that the only rescuing I'll be doing will be retrieving some paracetamol........

But as for you Creed, when you do get rescued, you're in the X-Division Tournament to determine a number one contender for that particular title.
____________________________________________________

Brother Ray - TTS

*Bangs Crate*

Ray:Quiet You
____________________________________________________

Kurt Angle - starwolf013

On behalf of the family welcome to the Mafia. I'm not sure if they will offer red plaid lining to the suit jacket, but it'd be worth asking.
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:Good Idea

D-Von:Do you guys want a Boxed Jobber who thinks hes a Boxer to celebrate?

Ray:Otherwise we were just gonna chuck him in the River
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:Take a deep breath

*Ray and D-Von carry the crate out the door*

*A Large SplashIs heard*

*Ray and D-Von come back in*

D-Von:Who wants Lunch?
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

*Sting just watches and does nothing to help, though deep down he feels sorry for Creed.*
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

So, can I get out now?[/color]
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

It's hard to pose when you're in a box[/color]
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:We never said we Locked the Crate

D-Von:He's just not very smart
____________________________________________________

[Title Master Mikey]

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***WCTNA Announcement***

Out of the four participants in X-Division No. 1 Contender's Tournament, two have been announced so far:

Jay Lethal
Consequences Creed

Two more X-Division competitors are required so you have until Monday at Midnight to register your interest.
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

*The lights go out all of a sudden, and when they manage to come back on, Kiyoshi's name is "Misted" on the wall*
____________________________________________________

Sonjay Dutt - Square

The Guru can take those two losers
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Team 3d paints over it ''WHO?''*
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

*The lights go out again, and the words "Kiyoshi, you fat retard" are written on Bubba's shirt*
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

"Now listen you lot, TNA Management are getting mighty pissed off with all this spraypainting and graffiti. This damn stuff is impossible to remove. The next time it happens, not only are y'all getting fined, you're cleaning it up. Got that?"
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

*Once again, the lights go out, and when they come back on, a piece of paper is stuck to the wall with the words "Fine" written on it*
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Brother Ray pulls out a pad of Sticky-Notes and writes ''Okay Don't go screamin at us like a Drive-Thru' and sticks it to Cornette's Head*
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Creed hops out of the box

Yo!

Jab jab

team 3-D!

Some sorta pose

soon

Kick, split, jab jab

you will face

backflip, points to the camera

THE CONSEQUENCES

scurries away
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:D-Von add kill the Jobber to our To-Do list

D-von: what did Alex Shelley do to us?

Ray:The other Jobber

D-Von:Its on right after ""Haze'" the New guy
____________________________________________________

Jim Cornette - Iron Giant

***IMPORTANT WCTNA ANNOUNCEMENT***

Owing to unfortunate circumstances, today's edition of iMPACT! scheduled to appear on 11pm GMT / 6pm EST will now take place tomorrow (24th) at 8pm GMT / 3pm EST.

It will also now be a 1-hour Christmas Special.

We apologise for any inconvience caused.
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

BISS!! TMORRA NIGHT, YOU GOTTA DEAL WIDDA JNENIC FREAK!! AN WEN I BEECHOO AN MAKE YOU TAP OUT TO DA SINER ACLINER, I'M GONNA BE FIRSS IN LYYNE FER DA TEENAY HEYWAIT CHAMPINSHIP!! AN DONLY REEZN YOU AINT PUTTIN DAT TILE ONNA LINE IZ CUZ YER SCARED DAT YER GON LOOZ IN RECKER TYME!! CUZ WEN BIG POPPA PUMP BRINGS TH'PAIN, HE BRINGS IT HARD!! AND DAT'S WHY DEY CALL ME TH'BIG BAAAAD BOODY DADDEH!!
____________________________________________________

Abyss - Amigo

Rellik made more sense then this guy!
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

Uhh.....how about you just kick his ass quick so we can focus on our title match, big guy?
____________________________________________________

Jeff Jarrett - Above Average

*This is a WCTNA.com exclusive*

We see Jeff Jarrett's office where he is sitting behind the desk in his usual seat.

Ladies and gentlemen, I have an important announcement to make to you all. It is in regards to WCTNA Management Director, Jim Cornette. On Wednesday morning, Mr. Cornette sent me an e-mail to tell me that he was handing in his notice with WCTNA as he had more pressing matters than WCTNA to deal with. Jim didn't disclose these matters, and quite frankly, it is his business. If he wants to keep it private, I am respecting that. We here at WCTNA would like to thank Jim for all of his work he has put in here both on screen in his authority role, and off the screen as well over the course of the last 2 and a half years. He has been a great asset to this company and the door is always open for him to return whenever he feels ready.

For now though, WCTNA will be requiring a new Management Director. Tonight on iMPACT! that person will be revealed, after I have made my final decision on who is the best choice to take Jim's place.

I hope that you enjoy tonight's show. Thank you.
____________________________________________________

27th December, 2008 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Kevin Nash - Evil M

*Nash celebrates by bringing some strippers into the ring and doing the Cotton Eye Joe with them*

Now THIS is how you celebrate a big win!
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner (Sajoa Patrick) & Kevin Nash (Evil M)

Jeremy Borash: This is "JB" Jeremy Borash and I'm backstage with "Big Poppa Pump" Scott Steiner and "Big Sexy" Kevin Nash of the Main Event Mafia, and tonight in our Impact Main Event, Steiner will be taking on the WCTNA Champion, "The Monster" Abyss in a non-title matchup. Scott, any thoughts before your match tonight?

Steiner: GIT OWMY FACE, JAYBEE!! NOW TONIGHT, BISS, DEY CALL YOU TH'MOSSUR, BUT YOU AINT SEEN NUTHIN TILL YOU SEPP INNA RING WIT BIG POPPA PUMP!! YSEE I SEEN ALLA MOSSERS, I SEEN ALLA JYNTES, I SEEN ALLA DRAGGINS ANNA OGERS AN ALL DOSE UDDER TINGS FROM DOSE DEE'N'DEE GAMES DAT DOSE ACTIVISION GUYS PLAY WHEN DEY SPOSDA BE TRAININ FERRA MATCH, AN I BEEDUM!! I BEEDUMALL, AN TONIGHT, BISS, YER GONNA BE TH'NEX CASUALLY, CUZ BIG POPPA PUMP DONT NEED DOSE DEE'N'DEE GAMES T'BEAT A MOSSUR LIKE YOU!! BIG POPPA PUMP GOT HIS FREAKS, AN HE GODDIS PEAKS, AN HE'S GONNA HAVE BIG KEVAMAAASH AT RINGSIDE!!

Nash: That's right, tonight I've got Scotty's back. And if Abyss thinks he can pull a fast one on the Main Event Mafia, well, he'd better think again. Abyss, you've gone through tables and chairs and thumbtacks and whatnot, but you've never experienced pain at the hands of the Mafia. And once Scotty Steiner's done with you, you'll wish you never won that WCTNA Title at our expense. Because sooner or later, that belt is coming back to where it belongs.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

C'mon Scotty! Finish him off so we hit the salon! My hair's a mess!
____________________________________________________

Jeff Jarrett - Above Average

Abyss goes for Shock Treatment but Steiner gets out and shoves Abyss into the referee. Nash immediately hauls himself into the ring and begins beating down Abyss. Morgan runs down to save his partner, but the rest of the Mafia are soon in as well to start a 5 on 2 beatdown. Christian Cage, Petey Williams and Rhino run to the ring though and attack the MEM evening the odds. Soon all the rest of the wrestlers in the locker room run out to separate the 10 wrestlers.

Jeff Jarrett's music plays and he comes onto the stage.

Well... now that... that's sorted out, it is time for me to reveal to you your new leader. Since all of you are out here right now, I can tell you the new Management Director is among you right now. This is a man whose loyalty to TNA Wrestling cannot be questioned. He's a man who brings such passion to iMPACT every single week. He's been here since the very first PPV down in Nashville. TNA Wrestling... your new Management Director is....















DON WEST!

Don comes onto the stage and shakes hands with Jeff as the show comes to a close.

WCTNA Impact Ends

[Title Master Mikey]

Abyss - Amigo

*Abyss hits Angle and Sting with Pipe shots, and throws Booker T into the crowd. He and Morgan then leave the Frontline to clean up what's left of the MEM*
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Sharmell, I destroyed you, and it was amazing. This truly shows how the coalition is superior to the MEM.

But I got something else coming now. I got myself a match with Jimmy Rave, the selfish s**thead who after I spent half a year working hard to get him to the top of the tag division, and once I try to go out on my own and go for my own title, suddenly he turns on me and calls ME selfish. Well I'll show him. I'm going to beat him down next week, and he's going to regret messing with me[/color]
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Ok, first show on the job, here is my proposed card. If you have suggestions or changes you feel need making, then do PM me, but be aware im not actually at home at the moment and wont be until tomorrow afternoon GMT, so i cant reply until then.

Being we have a PPV to build to, i feel this evening should be spent sorting out number one contenders, therefore we begin with

Kiyoshi vs Creed vs Dutt - winner is X division #1 Contender.

Kevin Nash and Booker T, i don't care if you two are friends outside of the ring, but in the ring the two of you face off for the rights to be number one contender for the Legends title.

Awesome Kong, you've enjoyed wrestling men, but im making you tonight, for one night only, a referee and you will officiate in match between Roxxi and Angelina Love and if you dont call it right, i will strip you of your title belt.

Seen as I have inherited some number one contenders, Beer Money Inc, you get your shot at the ppv, but before that James Storm and Chris Sabin get to fight it out here tonight in a 'Partner in a cage - Key on a Pole match'. Your respective partners will be hung in small cages above the ring. To release them and gain an advantage you must climb th turnbuckle, scale a pole and retrieve a key, before scaling the ultimate X structure upon which the cages are balanced. You'll enjoy that.

Christian Cage will face Scott Steiner and Rhino in our triple threat main event, the winner is the new Heavyweight number 1 contender.

I shall be watching from ringside at the commentary position and if anyone steps out of line, they'll have to deal with me and they will get it - Right In The FACE.
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

Wait. Hold on a sec, Don. No matter who wins that match for my Legends Championship, it stays within the family. Who's to say that Nash or Booker, no matter who wins the Number 1 Contender's match, won't simply lay down for me in the middle of the ring? Or I for them? And then the Coalition, Frontline, or whatever the rest of those punks like to call themselves whine about not getting a fair shot.

I think it's only in the interest of fairness that you make one of the competitors someone from outside our happy little family, even if they aren't part of a collection of true legends such as ourselves. A triple threat, if you will.[/b]
____________________________________________________

Kurt Angle - starwolf013

"West, this is insulting to the Mafia! I know that you want to make an Impact and solid first impression on the job.

I am asking you nicely to do the right thing. Scott Steiner is clearly outnumbered in this main event match against Christian and Rhino. Put me in the match to even the odds and make this a fatal four way. The Main Event on Impact deserves the godfather of the Main Event Mafia.
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

DASS RIGHT KERRANGLE!! DON WESS, FYOO PUT KRANGOAL INNA MAYVENT, IT MASE FERRA FAIR MATCH!! EVEN THO FYOO PUT KARANGAL INNA MATCH, DA CHANSIZ OF DA MANIVINT MAFIA TAKING DAT TILE SHOT DRASSICKLY ICKREASE!! CUZ WHEN BIG POPPA PUMP AN DA LIMPICO MELLIST, YOU PUDDEM TAGEDDER, YOU GOTTUS TOPPABLE FORCE!! AN SINCE TRISHDIN GAGE AN DA WORMISHEEN RAYN...RHYNO, DEY AINT GODDA CHANCE TO BEAT DA TOOVUSS, SO WHEN YOU ADD UP DA NUMBURZ, DAT MEANS THE MAYVENT MAFIA IZ GONNA TAKE HOME DAT TILE SHOT FOR GENSIS!!
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Wow! First week on the job, and already Don West is trying stir up trouble within the family! Don, it's not gonna work, so do yourself a favor: go back to selling baseball cards!

Hey, Book, I wonder if Don is calling the match, too? Maybe I'll throw in a "PELE!!! PELE!!!"
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Don, helloooo, I believe I have a match against that selfish buttmonkey Jimmy Rave, I will not have it forgotten[/b]
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*D-Von shoves Hemme out of the way*
Ray:Jimmy if your done talkin to the skanks we're goin back to family Bizness

D-Von:we Ain't been payin attention when are you gonna give us those Tag Titles?

Ray:We been hearin some crazy rumors that LAX are the champs
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Good to see that first week on the job and already iv got people talking.

Christy, I didn't forget, I thought I'd save such a match for the ppv, but now you've given me an idea. This week on Impact you get to team up with Kurt Angle to take on the Team 3D. With the special stipulation that if you win you get to pick Jimmy Rave's outfit for your match at Genesis, however should you lose, he'll get to pick what you wear. 3D, win this match and i'll make you the first challengers for whoever wins MCMG/Beer Money.

Mr Angle, your in this match now, so i'm afraid that Steiner remains on his own in that triple threat.

Christian, old times and old news - this is the dawning of a new era, an in your face era. And in this new era, you'll need to prove to me you deserve that shot by winning this match.

Oh, and those of you in 'The Family' who are contending for the Legends belt. You are absolutely right that someone could lay down for someone else. But should that happen, not only will i strip Sting of his title, but i'll suspend you until after Genesis. Seems to me that every family has a head....lets see who heads yours.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Don, I would appreciate it if Angle had some sort of motivation for actually helping me in this match, Team 3D gets a title shot, I get to embarrass Jimmy, but my partner doesn't have any stock in this match, especially considering us being members of opposing faction[/color]
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Angle's incentive is plain and simple. Angle needs to prove to me that he deserves the ridiculous amount of money he gets paid, he needs to prove to me that he deserves to be 'the godfather' and he needs to prove to me that he is as great as all the hype that surrounds him says he is. 1996 was 13 years ago.

However, you do make one good point Christy, what with the two of you being on opposing factional teams should Mr Angle not choose to help you in this way to the best of his abilities the only time he'll be seeing a gold belt is when he buys himself a replica from TNAShop.Com (and my insane daily deal the price to you all for any replica belt is only $99.99!)
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

That works[/color]
____________________________________________________

Kurt Angle - starwolf013

"West, if you keep disrespecting me like this I will make you wish you were back in 1996 hocking baseball cards and knives to the six people that watched your stupid network.

You want to put me in a match with that showgirl that benefits the MEM in no way possible? I'll play along. I'll do this favor for you... But one day you're going to have to do something for me. Not today, maybe not tomorrow, but rest assured it will be soon.
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Mr Angle, you think you can threaten me like this? You'll play along because I tell you to play along.

Like I've said, it's the start of a new era for TNA and if you want to be part of that, you'll remember where the power is - and that's right here with me.
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Team 3D sidles up next to West*
Ray:Don maybe you should think a bit more about That Donny

D-Von:You see Angle's going along with your weird series of Man vs Woman matches

Ray:And all he's asking for is One little favor

D-von:Its not even that Major a favor

Ray:We wouldn't want Christy to have an Accident before the match

D-Von:RIGHT IN THE FACE!!!!
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

HEY DON WESS, YOU DONE MORE THAN DISSISPEK DA LIMPY GO MELLIST, KERDANGAL!! YOU DISSISPEK DA MAYVENT MAFIA, CUZ DA MAYVENT MAFIA DONT SOSEEYATE WIT GUDDER TRAASH LIKE CHRISSY HEMME!! AN WASS MORE, DAT MATCH DONT MEAN NUFFIN INNA GRAND SKEEMA TINGS!! WAZ KRANGLEL GAIN FRUM BEENINA MATCH WITH CHRISSY HEMME?! MUFFIN, DATS WHAT!! KURRGANGLE SHABEE WRESTLIN IN BIG TIME MASHUS, FER DA TEENAY TITLE, ANFER RISPEK FER DA MAYVENT MAFIA!! AN BECUZZA SOME NO-TALENT BASEBALL CARD SELLIN NOBODY WHO SUNLEY DINKS HEEZ IN CHARGE ROUN HERE, HE GETS PUT IN A GO-NOWHERE, DO-NUTTIN MATCH WIDDA DIRTY DUMPSTER SLUT, WHEN HE SHOULD BE INNA MAIMA VENT!! ANDATS WHYYY, DON WESS, DALIMPIGO MEDDIST IS PISSED OFFITCHOO!!
____________________________________________________

2nd January, 2009 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Yes!

Jab Jab

I am now

Flip

The number one

Split

contender!

Jab, Kick

I'm commmmiiin' for yaaaa Peetteyyyyy
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

I guess everyone just wants to have Jimmy dress me up, I can accept that!

WCTNA Impact Ends

[Title Master Mikey]

Main Event Mafia - Evil M

After Impact goes off the air, the cameras continue filming...

*Angle jumps in the ring and goes after Christian. Rhino tries to make the save, but Kevin Nash runs out and nails Rhino with a chair. Nash powerbombs Rhino, while Angle locks Christian in the Ankle Lock. Finally, some officials run out and pull Nash and Angle off. The MEM members exit, looking very pleased with themselves, as the medical staff checks on Rhino and Christian*
____________________________________________________

The Coalition - madhackrviper

Christy and Petey run out to check to see if Rhino and Christian are OK.
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Patrick

Mike Tenay: Welcome to TNA.com! Your home for exclusive TNA clips and inside information that you can't get anywhere else! Immediately after Impact went off the air this week, Christian Cage and Rhino were jumped by the Main Event Mafia following the three-way match for the #1 Contendership to the TNA World Heavyweight Championship, won by Mafia representative Scott Steiner! After the beatdown, Scott Steiner had this to say to the victims of this vicious assault, and to his future opponent, The Monster Abyss, whom he will face for the TNA World Title at Genesis!

(MEM is backstage relishing in the results of their work. Lauren approaches for an interview.)

Lauren: Main Event Mafia, can I get a word with...

(Steiner immediately snatches the mic from her.)

Steiner: SEE DATS WHAT HAPNS WHEN YOU CROSS DA MAYVENT MAFIA!! RYE NOE AND KRISHN CAGE, YOU LYIN INNA POOL YER OWN BLOOD, AND THE BIG BAAAD BOODY DADDEH IZZA NUMMER ONE KATENNER TO THE TEENAY HEDDYWAIT CHAMISHIP!! AND AS FAR AS ABYSS GOES, SONLY A MADDERA TYYME, CUZ AT JESSISS, DAT TEENAY WURL CHAMPISHIP IZ GONNA BELONG TO ME, AN ISS GONNA BELONG TO DA MAYVENT MAFIA!! TAKE YER MIC BACK, BITCH!!

(MEM walks off as Lauren recoils in disgust.)
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

*at the Main Event Mafia locker room*

Jeremy Borash: Stinger! How do you feel about defending your WCTNA Legends Championship against fellow Main Event Mafia member Booker T?

Sting: Well JB, first off, let me congratulate my boy Scotty on his newly found Number One Contendership for the WCTNA World Championship. As for your question, this isn't the first time Booker and I have squared off. In fact, he and I faced each other while tagging with Christian Cage and Abyss for the World and Legends championships. Sure, we didn't exactly face each other, but we were competing, and Abyss and I won. He and Cage lost.

But there were no hard feelings. We are a family after all. And if Don West thinks something like this can split our Family apart, then he's even a bigger moron than I thought he was. Either way, the Legends Championship stays with the Main Event Mafia at Genesis. And if one holds it, we all hold it. I don't expect Booker to lay down. I expect a good match out of him. One based on respect. (Booker says "RE-SPEEEEECT!" off camera) And I'm sure he expects the same of me.

JB, I guarantee one thing. No matter who wins between Book and I at Genesis, the Main Event Mafia will come out of it stronger than ever.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Hey Rhino, obviously I wasn't satisfied beating you last week. I want more, so I'm challenging you to another match at Genesis. But this is no ordinary match. This is a Gas Station in Milwaukee Match! In this match, anything goes, and the match can only end at a gas station in Milwaukee! You think can handle it?
____________________________________________________

Rhino - Perpetual Nirvana

You think so, Nash? Well lets see what happens when you don't have your overpaid buddies watching your back. I don't care what kinda Russorific stipulation you come up with. You will feel the GORE GORE GORE!
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*The empty iMPACT! Zone is shown on screen, with Christian Cage chaining himself to one of the turnbuckles inside of the ring.*

Don West! I won my title shot 3 weeks ago fair and square! It's a god damn travesty that you took it from me, and it's even worse that you handed it to the Main Event Mafia after that! From this moment on, The Instant Classic is officially on strike! I refuse to remove myself from the ring until I get the title shot I EARNED back!!!!!

*Cage finishes chaining himself to the turnbuckle as the scene fades to black.*
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Creed approaches Petey backstairs

Yo! Petey!

Jab Jab

I want to say

Flip

I respect you fighting

Jab, kick, jab

The Main Event Mafia

Split

And I'm going to join

Jab Jab

You inna Coalition

Split

So I just want to make sure

Jab Jab

That you know that

Jab, Kick

I plan for out match

Split

To be one with mutual respect

Jab, flip. jab jab

So we can prove

Jab Jab

That the MEM

Kick

Are not the only people

Dramatic pose

Who can wrestle with respect
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy wispers to Christian outside the ring

Err... hey Christian, I'll join you in this strike if you want me to, but I kinda have some things to do
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

Fine, Creed's in the Coalition! Whatever! I've got way more important things to worry about here!!!

...for the record, this isn't a hunger strike. So, if someone could bring me food, that'd be killer.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Ooo! That I can do! I can totally service...

Err...

I mean serve you Christian!

As long as I don't actually have to join you, you can have as much food as you snorkin' want![/color]
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

Welcome to the fold Creed, here at the coalition we'll show that the only way to get respect around here is to earn it because that is what Arnold would do

*petey poses next to creed for 45 minutes*
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Team 3D wander in and Notice Cage*
Ray:Well lookie here We were gonna go out drinkin with The guys tonight but I think we just found something more fun

D-Von:*Pulls out NERF Gun and starts shooting Cage*

Ray:I'm gonna go get some things.....

D-Von:Christian you ever see Deliverance?
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*Christian Cage reaches into a pocket not covered by the chains and pulls out a Twinkie.*

Bubba...see the Twinkie?

*Cage throws the Twinkie.*

GO FETCH THE TWINKIE!!!
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Bubba runs off after the Twinkie*



































*D-Von shoots Cage in the eye with the NERF Gun*
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

STILL HERE, STILL ON STRIKE, AND STILL NOT MOVING UNTIL I GET JUSTICE DELIVERED!!!
____________________________________________________

Samoa Joe - TTS

*Samoa Joe hits Christian with a Donut*

Shaddup You
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Rhino -vs- Nash at the gas station is now confirmed as a match for Genesis.

On Impact this week matches will be announced featuring Kurt Angle and Christian, who can remain on strike. I do not negotiate with those who believe they can force me to do anything. Impact and indeed Genesis if need be will take place around you.
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Rhino, I'll see you in Milwaukee!
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

I'm not forcing you to do anything! I'm asking you to deliver justice! And if you refuse, then I'll just stay chained to the ring and rot until you do!
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

You want to stay in the ring that's fine. But if you're staying there you're going to make yourself useful and become ring announcer for the next Impact.

But i was channel hoping the other day and it seems to me up north they like having a woman doing the announcing, so who are we not to do the same.

So Christian, get ready to become Christina, because after this make over courtesy of the Beautiful People, you'll be the better of any horse faced failed singer they have.
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

Like I'm gonna do anything you ask me to do when you stole the title shot I EARNED and gave it to Scott Steiner of all people?!?!?
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

That my friend is what microphones are for.......but I can always make you the time keeper, or the the ring girl if you'd prefer.

I didn't steal anything. I asked Jeff Jarrett who was owed what and you didnt get mentioned. So management obviously didn't recognise what you claim to have earned.

So now, you can stay chained up but make yourself useful or you can unchain yourself and leave the Impact Zone until the next Impact.

The choice is yours
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

Or, since you obviously don't give a s*** about the hard work that I HAVE put in for this company, I'll just stop doing any work altogether and stay right the hell where I am.
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Well, we'll give you a mic anyway and see what you do, but by all means stay there, we'll even wheel the cateering cart down for you.
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

Oh, I'll do an "announcing" job, alright.
____________________________________________________

[Title Master Mikey]

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

HEY, KRISHN CAGE!! YOU COME OUDEERE, AN YOU KAPLAIN DAT YOU LOSS YER TILE SHOT, AN DAT YOU BIN SCROOD BY THE MADGMENT, AN ALL DAT UDDER CRAP DAT NO ONE WANNA HEAR BOUT!! DEN YOU CUFF YERSELF TO DA RING AN HAVE YERSELF A WHINY BITCHFEST CUZ YER FEELIN INADEQUATE, CUZ YOU LOSS TO A JNENIC FREAK!! EVEN YER BESS FREN, RYE NOE, AIN EVN HELPIN YOU!!

BUT I KASSIDER MYSELF A FAIR MAN, KRISHN GAGE!! I GOTTA TILE SHOT, YOU DINK YOU GODDA TILE SHOT, HOW BOUT YOU FACE ME DIS WEEK ON IMPACK, ANNA WINNER A DAT MATCH GOEZ ON T JESSISS, AN FACES BISS FER DA TEENAY WURL HEDWEIGHT CHAMPISHIP!!

BUT I'M GONNA ADD A LIL SIPULATION TO DA MATCH!! SISS YOU SEEM T'BE SO FONNA DOSE HANCUFFS, YOU GOTTA BEAT ME FER DAT TILE SHOT WIT ONE HAND CUFFD BEHYNE YER BACK!! NOW OVVISLY, I KIN BEAT YOU WIDDA BROKN ARM AN A HEMRIDGE ONNA BRAIN, BUT YOU PUTCHER SELF IN DIS SITCH WAISHUN, AN IF YOU WANNA TAKE MY TILE SHOT FRUM ME, YOU GODDA DO IT WIT ONE HANN BEHYNE YER BACK!! YOU GODDA DEAL KRISHN?!
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

First off, two things. 1. Steiner-to-English:

Hey, Christian Cage!! You come out there, and you complain that
you lost your title shot, and that you've been screwed by the management, and all that utter crap that no one wants to hear about!! Then you cuff yourself to the ring and have yourself a whiny bitchfest because you're feeling inadequate, because you lost to a genetic freak!! Even your best friend, Rhino, ain't even helping you!!

But, I consider myself a fair man, Christian Cage!! I got a title shot, you think you got a title shot, how about you face me this week on iMPACT!, and the winner of that match goes on to Genesis, and faces Abyss for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship!!

But I'm gonna add a little stipulation to the match!! Since you seem to be fond of those handcuffs, you've got to beat me for that title shot with one hand cuffed behind your back!! Now obviously, I can beat you with a broken arm and a hemmorage on a brain, but you put yourself in this situation, and if you want to take my title shot from me, you've got to do it with one hand behind your back!! You got a deal Christian?!

Secondly, I'm chained to the ring, not handcuffed. Chained, as in with chains.

Thirdly...

So, let me get this straight. The steroid junkie that stole MY title shot is saying that he'll offer to give me a shot at "his" shot now?

Tell you what, Steiner, how about this deal instead? Since I earned a shot fair and square, and you earned a shot fair and square since Jarrett was too stupid to know that I earned a title shot, make the match at Genesis a Triple Threat!

But, you and I will still have that match on iMPACT! this week, with a little stipulation. Whoever loses that match has to go into the title match at Genesis with one arm chained behind their back. How's that, freak? And don't make any mistakes, "freak" isn't a compliment.
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

YOU WANNA MAKE IT A TRIBBLE THREAT?! YOU GODDA DEAL!! DAT JUSS MEANS ONE MORE ASS DAT I GET TO KICK BEFORE I BECOME DA TEENAY CHAMPISHIP!!

AN DA HANDCUFFS, CHAINS, ROPES, WHADDEVER, I AINT GONNA BE DA ONE WIDDA HAND TIED BEHYNE MY BACK!! CUZ EVEN IF YOU FREE YER TIED ARM, ALL I GODDA DOO IZ BREAK D'UDDER!!
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Christy brings Christian food
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

hey christy could you possible bring me more protien powder
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Do I look like you're servant hun? I'm only serving Christian because he can't get food for himself

Chain yourself up with him in solidarity, then we'll talk[/color]
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Team 3D takes the food from Christy*
Ray:Thanks we were Runnin low on Ammo

*Team 3D Begins to throw food at Christian*
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Oh, now come on!

Ray would never waste food like that and you know it! ;D
____________________________________________________

Rhino - Perpetual Nirvana

You won't be seeing nothing, Nash, when I hit you with the GORE GORE GORE!
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

Now that this matter is over, Christian, I'm sure you're hungry. On behalf of all your friends at the Main Event Mafia, here is a $10 giftcard to McDonalds. Go nuts.[/color]
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

While that Coalition peasant eats with the lowest in society at McDonalds we the Mafia shall dine where the richest people in America dine.....Pizza Hut!

*raises pinkie finger above head*
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

Nah, forget Pizza Hut. I'm goin' to KFC!
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

NOW DATS WADDAM TALKIN BOUT!! GIT ME A FREE-PEESH DINNER, WIT MASH TATERS AND SOME GRAVAAYYY!!
____________________________________________________

Brother Ray - TTS

Ray:I SAY POPEYES OR BUST
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

McDonalds? Are you kidding me? Are you f***ing kidding me? Screw your charity, and screw your gift card!!!!!!

...I'm goin' to Burger King!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

Flip

In n' Out

Jab Jab, Point at camera

For the win
____________________________________________________

Brother Devon - TTS

D-von:that place is Still Open?

I say we all Compromise and go to Denny's
____________________________________________________

10th January, 2009 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

HEH?! WHO'S THE MAN?!

GITCHER ASS UP, KRISHN!!
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

<Don stands to speak to the whole Impact Zone> At Genesis Mr Angle, you get to open one of those two cases. Either you will win yourself the chance to essentially book two matches of your choice, one of which must include you, or you win the right to over see the Main Event Mafia disbanded. I suggest you pick carefully. And by the way, should you tamper with the cases in any way before Genesis, you're Fired.

WCTNA Impact Ends
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*Christian Cage is shown in a locker room, quietly thinking to himself. After about a minute of silence, he finally looks up to the camera.*

TNA...Total Nonstop Action Wrestling...

I've been in this company for over three years. I was the first man to come here from the big leagues. Needless to say, I benefitted. In those three years, I held the most prestigious World Championship in professional wrestling history...twice. My good friend Tomko made his way here, and I took AJ Styles under my wing to mold him into a true main eventer. Life was good.

And then it all came crashing down, September 24, 2006. The day that Kurt Angle was signed to TNA. Ever since that day, this company has become a hellhole. Triple A got his lips on the right ear and he's been running this company into the ground. Hell, he got his wife a contract for......why was that again? Oh, of course, because she was Kurt Angle's wife! And let's not forget the fiasco in '07 at Hard Justice. Don't remember that night? I think you do, actually, because it was the night where Kurt Angle won EVERY SINGLE TITLE IN THE COMPANY IN ONE MATCH!!!!!!

And now, we've got Kurt and his new "Mafia" buddies running around acting like they rule the world and screwing good, hardworking guys out of their spots. Hell, I worked my ass off to earn a title shot beating one of Kurt's buddies Booker T, and then a few weeks later Don West conveniently "forgot", and gave the shot to another of Kurt's buddies, Scott Steiner. Hell, I didn't get that wrong written until I had to go on strike, for god's sake. And the only way they let me into the match that I got screwed out of in the first place is by having one arm tied behind my back. Well, I'm done with this s***. Abyss, I really hope you've got friends, because come this Sunday, most likely I'm not gonna be here to lead the fight anymore.

*Christian Cage sighs, then reaches into his bag and pulls out...









...a WWE contract.*

If...or should I say when...I get f***ed over on Sunday, then Angle, Steiner, Booker, Nash, none of you old, spot-jacking assholes don't have to worry about seeing me in TNA ever again. Sting, I'm really sorry it had to end this way. I knew I wouldn't be able to stop your group, but I was at least hoping I'd be able to get you to come to your senses. Stinger, this is probably the last thing I'll ever say in TNA, so I want you to remember it and remember it well: Sting...no, Steve Borden. We respect you.

*Cage leaves the locker room with a sullen look on his face as the camera fades to black.*
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Alright, as I have been injured, I would like to request that either another knockout brave enough to face a man, or a man willing to defend my honor step up to take my place, sadly including the costume change, at Genesis. I must show Rave how much he's hurt me

Lance, I'm giving you a chance here. Turn on Jimmy and show him what you do to people who insult your woman, and I'm yours again. Seriously, straight out.

If not, I will accept any other champion male or female, and will be in their corner.[/color]
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:NaNananananananana Hey Hey Hey Goodbye

D-Von:Team 3d ruining the Mood since 1993
____________________________________________________

Rhino - Perpetual Nirvana

Christian, I support your decision, brother. However I'm in no position to follow you back to that craphole up north. No offense. You've still got a shot up there, you have friends in high places, your brother has influence up there but me? My choice became clear when they turned ECW into a pale shell of it's former self. So I'm gonna stay right here and take it to those main event assholes. Christy, Petey, Creed! I ain't much of a leader but I know what it's like to fight a wrestling war. If you're still up for it, the fight is still on. Mafia, you may use your "politics" to get ahead but you will still feel the GORE GORE GORE!!!
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed & Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

I'm in for sure Ryno! I'm ready to take it too the Mafia, this is not over[/color]






Flip

I'm in too

Jab-jab
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:One half of Beer Money is Injured D-Von Do you know what that Means

D-Von:We have to bring our own Beer to the PPV?

Ray:No it was the Bland,Uninteresting one

D-Von: Consequences Creed was in was in Beer Money?

Ray:No he should be at The Bottom of a lake but that was retconned

D-von:Damn Political Correctness

Ray:What was I saying again?

D-von:You were saying if only there was a decorated Tag-Team with years of Experience to take Beer Moneys place

Ray:LOD doesn't work here D-Von

D-von:Oh Yeah.................

Ray:Can the Steiners do it?

D-Von:Theres more than one Steiner?

Ray:Oh yeah............................

D-Von:Perhaps theres a Decorated former ECW Team who could do it?

Ray:Public Enemy's Dead so I guess we'll have to do it

*Team 3D Smile at the Camera*
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Alright, as much as this hurts I have to admit it

I'm far too injured to wrestle at Genesis, and possibly for awhile after that.

But the fact is, I was injured training to wrestle, I've been training hard because I have targets. I have people I want to prove that I am better than, and when I'm back, I'm going to do it. I'm going to destroy every one of these people

Kong, whether you're still champion or not, when I'm back I'm going to show you that you are really just a fat slob, not the unstoppable juggernaut that you have people think you are. You better be back when I'm back, because when that happens you're going down.

Sharmell, I beat you once, so I you're not worth the effort anymore, but the fact is that I'm still part of the Coalition and so if the Main Event Mafia is still here when I return, I have to beat you and beat you since you are my opposite number among them

Beautiful People, Jacqueline, Sojourner, Raisha Saeed, Rhaka Khan, you're all threats on my way to Women's Champion, and people I may have to defend against once I get it, so you can all expect to see me in the ring soon, beating you down.

SoCal Val, as me being fired from WWE proved, there's only room for one firecrotch per company, so I'm going to shove you out they door.

ODB, Roxxi, Madison, Traci and Taylor, just because the crowd is behind you doesn't mean I am, you are threats too, I may like you girls, and you may be on my side, but I never know when I'll need to fight you, and so be prepared.

Jimmy and Lance! Whether I have to fight you myself or through someone else a bit stronger, I will make sure you get beat for what you did. You wouldn't let me out of your shadow, and now that I am, I'm done with the both of you. Lance, you had your chance to get me back, you didn't take it. It's over
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

Tonight sting you and I will tear the house down. Two things are for certain the better man will will win and the Legend's title will stay in the MEM.

WCTNA Thread 2 Ends

[Title Master Mikey]

16th January, 2009 - WCTNA Genesis Begins

Don West - Legion

***As the match continues, Don West makes an annoucement***
Jeff Jarrett has just been in contact with me to inform me that he is unable to be here until very late tonight. As such, Angle's briefcase will not be opened until he arrives
____________________________________________________

James Storm - Perpetual Nirvana

***Storm grabs the mic*** And introducing my tag team partner for this evening, a guy that i respect because he can drink even me under the table. We've had out differences in the past, but what's a beer bottle between friends. Welcome Eric Young!
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

As he celebrates from the turnbuckle, Creed rolls out of the ring, grabs a chair, gets back in and takes Petey out. After 4 vicious chair shots to the back and one final one to the head, Creed grabs a mic "I bounce and bop and dance for you people and what do I get? I get nothing that's what! I hate you all. From now on, Consequences Creed doesnt care about the Consequences, he doesnt care about any of you and he wont rest until that title is wrapped around my waist"

WCTNA Genesis Ends
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

DAT'S RIGHT!! WOSS AGAIN, BIG POPPA PUMP IZZA WERL HEDDYWAIT CHAMPIM!! AN MORE PORTLY, DA TEENAY CHAMPINSHIP IZ WERT BLONGS, RIGHT HERE, WIDDA MAYVENT MAFIA!!
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

SISSYME DA NOOLY CROWN WURL HEYWEIGHT CHAMPYIN, I DINK I'M TH'MOST QUALFIED DOPEN THE BREEFCASE!! KERDANGUL, WID YUR BLESSIN, I'M GONNA GET YOU DAT BOOKING SPOT AND DA MAYVENT MAFIA WILL REIGN SUPREME AGAIN!!

AND BOOKAH, DERE AINT GONNA BE NO EENY MEENY MINEY MO BOUT IT!!
____________________________________________________

Jeff Jarrett - Above Average

Okay Champ, what case is it gonna be? Case A or Case B?
____________________________________________________

Rhino - Perpetual Nirvana

Which is why the TNA Frontline, Coalition whatever our name is, are looking for members. *looks off camera* Oh yeah, GORE GORE GORE!
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

HEY, DON DINK DAT I RUN OFF OR SUMPIN!! I WAS DISTRACTED ABH ONE OF MAH FREEKS IN DA FRONT ROW!!

AFFER MUCH DELBRATION, AH CHOOZ CASE NUMBER B!!
____________________________________________________

Jeff Jarrett - Above Average

Okay Scotty. When I open this case it will either say "Creative Control" to represent the ability to book 2 matches at some future date, or it will say "MEM disbanded" which will mean none of you can team up, and will also stop the gangland hits.

So, without further ado... I shall open Case B.... drumroll please.

Jeff inserts the key into the case and opens it. He opens up the lid to reveal....













































































MEM DISBANDED!
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

NO!! DATS BULLs*** DON WEST!! DIS WHOLE THING WAS RIGGED!! YOU BEEN AGAINST DA MAYVENT MAFIA FRUM DA START!! OPEN DAT UDDER CASE!! I WANNA SEE WHAT'S IN IT!!
____________________________________________________

Don West - Legion

Don West and the other case have moved back to the announce table. Don picks up his head set.

Don: You want me to open the other case Steiner? That's fine. Here, see.

Don opens the case by him, as promised the card inside reads "Creative Control"

Don: Unlike you people, Don West doesn't need to cheat.
____________________________________________________

Scott Steiner - Sajoa Moe

(Steiner simply throws down his microphone and walks off in disgust.)
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

That's right, no more jabs, no more flips, no more nothing. Petey Williams, I'm still coming after your X Division Belt, I want a rematch as soon as possible. I'm done with trying to entertain the fans, done done done.

Because no

It's time

To face







You thought I'd say Consequences? Bah, it's not about Consequences anymore. My name is Austin Creed, screw nicknames invented so I can be a little flip monkey for Don West and his ilk. I'm not a flip monkey anymore. I'm just me, Austin Creed, the wrestler, and I'll do what it takes to win[/color]
____________________________________________________

Christian Cage - The Tank

*Camera cuts back to the parking lot where Christian Cage in street clothes is heading to his car. Lauren rushes to catch up with him.*

Christian! You can't really be leaving, can you?

*Cage, still sullen as ever, turns to face her and grabs the mic. He then looks the camera dead on.*

I'm a man of my word, TNA. I'm gone. I'm never coming back. Rhyno, Christy, whoever the hell else is gonna stay in the game for the sake of this company instead of their ego, just remember: Sting is not an enemy. He can still be saved. He can still be brought back to his senses. As for the rest of them......Abyss....Terry....destroy 'em. Cripple 'em. Hell, kill 'em if you have to. They will never give up unless you make it their only choice, so that's exactly what you have to do.

*Christian throws his bag in the trunk of his car, and drives off into the darkness.*
____________________________________________________

? - The Tank

*A promo suddenly begins, with dramatic music playing. A figure, obscured by darkness, can be seen in the TNA ring practicing various maneuvers. The TNA deep-voiced promo announcer begins speaking...*

An in-ring veteran with a career spanning nearly twenty years...

A former World Heavyweight Champion...

A seven-time World Tag Team Champion...

He is coming back to TNA, and he will lead the next generation of superstars to greatness...

*Camera fades to a black screen, when one phrase appears on screen...*

Tonight, a legend is born...
____________________________________________________

17th January, 2009 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Don West - Legion

Don: Last night at Genesis the Main Event Mafia captured, through Scott Steiner, the Heavyweight Championship. Steiner then went on open the case Angle won after winning his keys to the kingdom match last week. Steiner's choice was case B and that case, when it was opened, contained the order to see the Main Event Mafia disband. So, without further halting, please welcome the Main Event Mafia to the ring for the final time.



***Sting, Scott Steiner, Booker T, Sharmell, Team 3D and Kurt Angle enter the ring***

Don: I was sorry to hear that Kevin Nash is injured and would be unable to attend this evening. As for the rest of you, let us start as we mean to go on. This evening each of you will pair off and face each other. So tonight, we'll be seeing Scott Steiner vs. Sting as our main event. Sharmell, you'll be in action teaming with the TNA Knockouts Champion Roxxi and a tag match against the Beautiful People, Team 3D by rights you should be banned even from being a tag team any longeer, but i'm giving you a final chance. Tonight you will face LAX - win and you can countinue as a team, lose and you'll face the same ban that all the others face on teaming. As for our Legends Champion Booker T, you'll be taking on Kurt Angle and that match starts right now!
____________________________________________________

? & ? - The Tank

*Suddenly, the lights in the iMPACT! Zone all turn off, save for a few spotlights moving erratically around the arena in an attempt to give that "epic" feel. The iMPACT-Tron begins displaying the following statements for a short while in succession...*

The time is now...

The place is here...

The moment has come...

Welcome To The Future...











*BG James makes his way to the ring amid the mixed reaction of the fans. Some, obviously dissapointed by this revelation, make their voices heard. Others, somewhat elated even if simply for nostalgia, cheer for the former member of the 3 Live Kru as he enters the ring and takes a microphone.*

Didn't see that comin', didja? Lemme guess: It was tha "Former World Champion" thing that threw ya off, wasn't it? Well, for tha younger iMPACT! fans, look up a lil' thing called WWA. Movin' On.

Now, I come out here, and I hear a lotta things: I hear a lotta fans cheerin' me, and that's cool.

*Both the fans cheering and booing get louder, and get into feuding chants of "BG James" "SUCKS!" for about 15 seconds. BG chuckles quietly.*

I also hear a lotta these people givin' me a load of crap!

*Once again, the fans in attendance booing begin to do so louder.*

A'ight, a'ight, a'ight: I want you people booin' me t' take a trip down memory lane right quick. Let's just think back t' tha WWF for a lil' bit. You had Austin at tha top, you had Rocky a little lower than that, and who was right under them as far as tha crowd was concerned? The New Age Outlaws, that's who! And you can bet your ass that it wasn't cuz of Billy boy, and that's a fact! There's only one reason everybody remembers the Outlaw days, and it's one simple statement...

*BG takes a deep breath, and assumes the position that the fans remember all too well, ready to say it with him...*

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! BOYS AND GIRLS! CHILDREN OF ALL AGES! D-GENERATION.....

Actually, gotta cut it short right there, or ol' Vinnie Mac'll drop a lawsuit on my ass faster than you can say "K-Dawg got canned"!

*Both factions of the crowd laugh at the potshot. A few fans try and get a "Konnan" chant started, but fail.*

Exactly. That's the reason right there why tha Kru failed. Once again, Movin' On.

Now then, I'm back here on TV for two reasons, and the first of those reasons is t' get tha people out there booin' me t' shut tha hell up!!!

Look, you ain't clever, and you ain't "smart" for booin' me. I. GET. IT. I'm old, I been around forever, and some of you guys out there are still callin' me a reject from up north. Well, wrestling is what I love, it's what I've always wanted to do, and since I'm gettin' up there in years I still wanna be a part of it somehow. So if you can't even let me stand at ringside during a match, then please do the people who actually give a damn about us instead of tryin' to get themselves over at our expense a favor and GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!!!

*The fans cheer loudly at this.*

Now then, order of business #2. You've heard tha announcements already. You know already that I'm buildin' up a "family" so t' speak. Now, don't get me wrong. This ain't gonna be like no Mafia. The only association these guys are gonna have is me.

And now, the moment has come.........

Ladies and Gentlemen...

Boys and Girls...

Children of all ages...

Dawg-House Enterprises proudly brings to you...

The Legend in the Making...

The Future of Professional Wrestling...

The Crown Jewel of TNA...

The One...

The Only...



JIMMY RAVE!!!



*Jimmy Rave, wearing a black & gold robe which should look very familiar to fans of a certain indy promotion, makes his way to the ring. He exchanges a big handshake with BG James.*

Jimmy Rave is the prime example of what's been wrong with TNA lately. Before coming here, Jimmy Rave was thought of one of the greatest young wrestlers on the face of the earth. He was tearin' up the indy scene, and promotions in Japan were begging for Rave to make an appearance. After comin' t' TNA, though, he's gone nowhere. And every single one of ya knows it. Jimmy Rave has the potential to rule TNA. Jimmy Rave has all the skills, the talent, the intellect, and the abilities to overcome any obstacle in his way to tha top. And with yours truly leading tha way, Jimmy Rave is going to dominate this company. Jimmy Rave is going to rule this company. Ladies and gentlemen, The Crown Jewel has arrived. And TNA will never be the same.

*BG begins to leave, expecting Jimmy Rave to follow, but Rave suddenly stops him and takes the microphone.*

Lance Rock, if you haven't gotten the message yet, we are officially done as a team. I am sick and tired of being a joke in this company. I am tired of coming out here once a month and saying "We love you, Boston!" or whatever city for no reason, sounding like a complete retard. It's over. No more stupid jokes, and no more fake rock rip-offs. Actually, that's not true. I've got one last one to do, in tribute to none other than the man himself: Jimi Hendrix.

*Jimmy Rave takes off his robe, revealing the Guitar Hero guitar strapped to his back. He lays it on the mat, and pulls out a lighter and a can of lighter fluid. Obviously, the guitar goes up in flames as Jimmy Rave and BG James leave the ring.*
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

Jimmy Rave is no Legend. He doesn't hold a candle to BOOKAH!
____________________________________________________

BG James - The Tank

Is that right, Book? Or, should I say "Your Highness"? Are you still pullin' that crap?

You know what, Book? You're right. We've been disrespectful. Wait, scratch that. We've been dis-REE-SPECT!!!-ful. And, Book, I'll tell ya how this lil' thing's gonna go down. You're gonna give Jimmy Rave a shot at your title...

*Jimmy Rave taps Booker T on the back with a steel chair, and Booker turns around to see Rave behind him. He turns back to BG James, who is holding a lead pipe.*

Or we gonna make you give Jimmy Rave a shot at your title. Your move, "Your Majesty".
____________________________________________________

Jimmy Rave - The Tank

*Jimmy Rave begins stomping down Rhino after the match. BG James lifts Rhino to his feet, and Rave hits Ghanarhea on Rhino, then begins screaming "YOU'RE NEXT, BOOKER! YOU'RE NEXT!!!" as iMPACT! goes to commercial.*
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

Jimmy Rave is an amazing performer no doubt but he's no legend. And a word of advice Jimmy, ditch that has-been peice of crap BG. Jimmy if you can beat me next week and beat me again to win the Legends title you'll have earned my respect. As for my strategy JB I'm gonna kick some ass

WCTNA Impact Ends
____________________________________________________

[Title Master Mikey]

Kiyoshi (Amigo), BG James & Jimmy Rave (The Tank)

Jeremy Borash: JB here for TNA on Youtube, and I'm here with BG James and the Crown Jewel of TNA, Jimmy Rave. Jimmy, next week you've got a Hardcore match against Booker T. We interviewed Booker during iMPACT!, and this is what he had to say:

Jan 17, 2009 17:38:14 GMT -5 Brahma Bull said:

Jeremy Borash: Booker next week you have a Hardcore match against Jimmy Rave. What's your strategy?

Jimmy Rave is an amazing performer no doubt but he's no legend. And a word of advice Jimmy, ditch that has-been peice of crap BG. Jimmy if you can beat me next week and beat me again to win the Legends title you'll have earned my respect. As for my strategy JB I'm gonna kick some ass

Gentlemen, your thoughts?

Jeremy, our thoughts are simple. Next week, my boy Jimmy Rave's gonna get in that ring and tear Booker T apart.

Booker T's problem is that he's overly arrogant. Booker, you were never destined for greatness like Jimmy Rave. You were just the right guy in the right place at the right time. Unfortunately, that led to the wrong situation. Tha situation of Booker T becoming a five-time World Champion. Booker, you were never meant to be a World Champion at all. And in TNA, you're not meant to hold that Legends Championship.

Booker T, tha only reason you held on to that Legends Championship was because of tha Main Event Mafia. And now that they're gone for good, tha only thing that's keepin' that Legends Championship around your waist is time. And startin' next week, you're officially on borrowed time. Next week, you find out what happens when you step in the ring with the Legend in the Making.

Booker, you don't need to worry too much about next week. I'm definitely gonna beat you, but I'm not gonna do what I probably should and cripple you. There's just no point in that. The effort I've gotta make to pin you in the ring 1-2-3 is the definition of minimal. So there's no reason to make the title match any easier, simply because I am that good. Earlier tonight, I made the War Machine tap out. Next week, I am going to.........

*Suddenly, the lights turn off. A thunderbolt is heard, and when the lights turn back on, a message is written on the wall in a blood-like substance...*

WE NEED TO TALK

What the hell was that?

I...have no idea...but I think I've got a call t' make.

*BG James and Jimmy Rave leave quickly.*

That was Jimmy Rave and BG James, folks. Rave has Booker T next week in a Hardcore match, with a Legends Championship match on the line for Rave. For TNAwrestling.com via Youtube, I'm Jeremy Borash. Guys, what was that?

*JB continues talking to the staff about the mysterious message as the feed cuts out.*
____________________________________________________

Kevin Nash - Evil M

The following is a WCTNA Exclusive

*After Impact ends, Kevin Nash appears on the video screen*

Ladies and gentlemen, if wouldn't mind remaining seated for a few minutes, I have something I would like to say.

I've been in this business for a long time, and I've seen a lot of guys come and go. I just want to say that WCTNA has some of the most dedicated guys I've ever seen, and that it has been a true honor working with all of you for the last 5 years.

Now, unfortunately, I'm in pretty bad shape, and the doctors say my career may be over. Now I know, you've all heard that thousands of times before from other guys. However, I have a family at home, and they need me. They come first. So, it is on that note that I make the toughest decision of my career: Effective immediately, I am taking a sabatical from WCTNA, possibly a permanant one. It's been great run, but some things in life are just more important. Thank you for listening to what I have to say, and hey. Never say never.
____________________________________________________

Sting - M.O.P

On behalf of everyone in WCTNA, Kev, Good luck and godspeed. We've been together in this business for over 13 years, and I hope you can make it back so it'll be even more.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Jimmy! Don't think your little costume change and "serious" turn means that you'll escape my wrath!!!!![/color]
____________________________________________________

Booker T - Brahma Bull

Kevin, I have great REE-SPECT for you. good luck
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

That shows you what happens when you stop trying to entertain the crowd and focus on wrestling. I beat Petey today because I didn't do no flip monkey bulls**t and I'm prowd of myself. No I'm the new WCTNA X Division Champion because I'm more focused then ever[/color]
____________________________________________________

Jimmy Rave & BG James - The Tank

Bitch, I've got experience in beating women. Do you really want to start s*** with me?

You sure that came out right, Jimmy?

Chung?

OH! I forgot all about that stuff. If it's gonna be like that, then go ahead, man.

Christy, I'll just say this: things aren't gonna be pretty if you keep screwing with me.
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

Jimmy, if anything, you started sh**t with me when you abandoned me when I dared strike out on my own. I've been wanting my revenge for that for awhile, and I lost my chance to get it when I got injured. But when I get back, you WILL suffer for what you did[/color]
____________________________________________________

Consequences Creed - madhackrviper

So I have to defend my title against two guys who's gimmick is imitating hasbeens?

I'm not afraid, I'm not afraid at all[/color]
____________________________________________________

Jacqueline - Perpetual Nirvana

Taylor, you call yourself a "Princess"? That's awfully appropriate because I eat pretty little barbie dolls little you for breakfast. Good luck, Princess Maple.
____________________________________________________

Taylor Wilde - cabbage



We can hear her theme song blaring from her mp3 player head phones. She looks at Jackie. She has a smug look on her face.

"The Maple Leaf Princess" Taylor Wilde: "Do you know who your talking too? Jackie Morre...your talking to wrestling royality...canadian royalty...you should be bowing down to me honey. Why? Because i'm simply amazing...Everyone wishes they were me. I mean not many people can look this fine and still be able to hold it down. I'm more then just some barbie doll...i'm delicously viciouse...see I always get what I want...I have always gotten what I want...and I want to be Knockout Champion...now unfortunitly for you that means you are going to get a Canadian sized beat down fitting for a whore like you...Oh and by the way...I don't need luck...I'm just that damn good...BOW DOWN TO ME BITCHES...or I WILL FORCE YOU ONTO THOSE KNEES

Taylor struts off as she puts her ear phones back in her head.
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Team 3D are watching*
Ray: *Elbows D-Von* Hey D-Von

D-Von:What?

Ray:Canadian Bacon

D-Von:Hehe
____________________________________________________

Christy Hemme - madhackrviper

To the hospital with Lauren!

Christy, what are your thoughts on Petey's replacing you with Taylor Wilde? Do you feel betrayed?

Blinks

Wait, you expected me to care? I mean... it's Petey!!!
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

*Petey repeatly poses and flexes for Taylor Wilde*

Hey Creed you got lucky last week but with this fine young lady right here in my corner now theres now way your gonna be able to pull of and upset like that again, with Taylor by my side i dont even need to ask what would arnold do, because that X division title is now the number 2 priority on my list right now, why number 2 because taylor is number one, so Creed watch your back and holla if you hear ME!
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

See, this is why I am now champion Petey. I let go of all distractions, the crowd, love, even family, and concentrated on one thing, the belt. Not it's around my waist, not yours. Yet you still can't concentrate on the title. You still keep with your posing for the crowd, and worse, you even say outright that it's just a #2 priority. I mean, seriously, some blond tramp you've been with for all of a day is more important to you than the title? Then you deserve to have lost it[/color]
____________________________________________________

Shawn Daivari - Evil M

My name is Sheik Adbul Bashir.

Hold on. I'm absolutely tired of this. No matter where I go, I get stereotyped as the "Evil Foreign Heel." I'm sick of it! So let me start over.

My name is Shawn Daivari. And tonight on WCTNA Xplosion, I will be taking on Petey Williams. Now like myself, Petey is a former X Division champion. We were even allies for a short time. Petey, I have a lot of respect for you, but the bottom line is this. I want MY X Division title back. And beating you, the former champion, is a step towards my goal.

I know I'm going into this as the bad guy, which is ridiculous when you really think about it. Do you people ever stop to think about WHY you hate me? I mean really, who are YOU to judge ME?

But no matter. From this point on, I don't care what you fans think of me. I'm here for ME.

My name is Shawn Daivari, the "Evil Foreign Heel."
____________________________________________________

21st January, 2009 - WCTNA Xplosion Begins

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

Shawn, I have to say that I welcome your competition. I know that I must defend my belt, but I don't want to have to keep defending it against people who put their time and energy into copycatting other wrestlers. Like Very Very Little Petey Pump, Stone Lukewarm Shark Boy, and The Not So Great Muta. I'm done with that. I want to wrestle matches again guys like you, guys who are concentrated on one thing.

The belt

So congrats Shawn on your win tonight.[/color]

WCTNA Xplosion Ends
____________________________________________________

[Title Master Mikey]

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

Well, that was obviously a fluke win. No way anyone who bothers to work up a gimic could beat a purely serious and concentrated wrestler like me.

I now have two choices, I could continue to chase the X Division title until I get it back, which of course will be the next time I'm in a title match

Or, option two, is me offering Shawn Davairi an alternate route. You are one of the only other wrestlers in this company who I respect, and I would like you to consider an offer to persue the tag titles together[/color]
____________________________________________________

Shawn Daivari - Evil M

Well, Austin, first of all, tough break tonight. It's gotta hurt to lose the title in your VERY FIRST TITLE DEFENSE.

Secondly, you are a fine technical wrestler, but I don't know if you're in my league. So I'll tell you what. If you can beat me in a match on Impact, you can consider us tag team partners. But if I win, you forfeit your rematch clause for the X Division title... TO ME!

The choice is yours, my friend.
____________________________________________________

Petey Williams - Evilution

ERRY BODY KNOW... WANTS TO KNOW... nah im kidding, sorry i cant do it with a straight face. Thanks to my princess Taylor wild, ive relised i dont wanna live in anyones shadow, especially that worn out, past his prime sack of crap Scott Steiner, Im my own man, from now on its just Maple Leaf Muscle and The Maple Leaf Princess and Muta i mean Kiyoshi you better not get to attached to that belt
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

I'm willing to risk my rematch, as strange as that sounds, so deal[/color]
____________________________________________________

Lance Rock - Evilution

AFTER I WIN THAT TITLE LADIES THE FIRST THING I WANNA KNOW IS WHO WANTS TO GET INFECTED
____________________________________________________

24th January, 2009 - WCTNA Impact Begins

Beer Money & Eric Young - Perpetual Nirvana

(TO THE BACK, more precisely the locker room of Beer Money v2, where the TNA tag champs, Eric Young and James Storm are hanging out having a beer or twelve.)

James, it's cool you picked me but what was the deal when you hit me with a beer bottle last week?

Sorry 'bout that. I guess it was a little heavy handed. Here's a peace offering.

(Storm hands EY a six pack. Young takes it.)

Hey, hey, hey!

(Storm takes one beer form the six pack and hands it to Young.)

Well thanks.

(Suddenly Miss Jackie Moore bursts in)

James, there's someone here to see you.

(Robert Roode hobbles in on crutches)

Well isn't this sweet.

Hey Bobby, how's the ankle?

First off, it's Robert. Second, how's the ankle? How's the ankle!? When I dropped out of our match for the tag titles I expected you to pick a worthwhile replacement. I have the means and the money to hire any talent in the world but no, you said "I've got it covered, trust me". So like a fool, I did. And you pick this clown? A putz who's scared of his own pyro?

Actually, I got over that, I'm not...

He was a screwup back in our Team Canada days and he's he a screwup now.

Look, Bobby...

ROBERT! My name is Robert! Anybody would have been a better choice. Why didn't you ask Jackie? How about Sharkboy? We could have put in a call to your old partner, I here he needs a paycheck. Providing he can sim down to fit into his wrestling gear.But no, You picked this useless, good for nothing...

(Eric can't take anymore of this and suddenly snaps)

ENOUGH! The fact is you and him hand a perfectly good opportunity to win the tag titles and couldn't do it. Yet I team with James once and we win the belts right away. Not hard to see who the weak link in the team is. You call me a screwup and a putz yet I seem to recall you putting a whole lot of time and effort into signing me to Robert Roode Inc., even throwing your "personal assistant" at me.

You and Traci? Traci Brooks? With the...

(Cups his hands in fornt of his chest. EY grins and nods)

Sweet. I wonder how she compares with Jackie's boo...

(Storm catches Jackie flashing him the evil eye)

Boots! Jackie's wrestling boots.

Look, the fact is BOBBY, I'm may have changed but you are still an insufferable asshole.

(With that Eric slaps Roode across the face)

This isn't over, James.

(Roode exits)

Damn!
____________________________________________________

Jay Lethal - mikeyp

Ooo Yeah, Black Machismo Jay Lethal, back in TNA and I want the Great Muta to know that I'm coming for that X Divison title and it doesn't matter if I have to go through Stone Cold, Iron Sheik or anybody else. And after that, I'm going to find a new Liz but for now TNA better snap into a Slim Jim. Dig it!
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

Jay, people will only take you seriously when you drop the copycat bull and the flip monkey antics. For now, you're just one of four, yes, four copycat flipmonkees in this company. Maybe you're the best of them, maybe, but serious wrestlers who don't give half a sh*t about gimmicks need more attention in the company[/color]
____________________________________________________

Jay Lethal - mikeyp

Hey Tony Atlas, what's happened? You used to be alot more fun. Maybe it's because a midget beats you up every Tuesday but even then, remember the good old days with you and Rocky. You don't have to be serious in order to have glory.
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi (Amigo), BG James & Jimmy Rave (The Tank)

TO THE BACK!!!

JB here with BG James and The Crown Jewel of TNA, Jimmy Rave.

*BG snatches the mic almost immediately.*

JB, do the non-homosexual viewing audience a favor and get lost! What we saw tonight was a travesty! My boy Jimmy Rave was s'posed to get a match with Booker T tonight, a match f'r a shot at tha Legends Championship, the title Jimmy Rave was born 'n bred t' hold. Instead, he gets a throwaway match with Petey Williams t' get some random whore a shot at tha Women's Title! Don West, don't you make no mistakes now: If The Legend in the Making doesn't get his match against "The Legend of Legends" next week, then BG-t'-tha-Jizzle is bookin' himself in a Hardcore match next week.....against YOU, Don West.

*Jimmy Rave requests the mic.*

Book, you got lucky tonight. You don't have to step in the ring with the REAL Legend. You got saved by Don West tonight. But next week...you don't get saved. Next week...you get crippled. And next week, you g....

*Jimmy Rave is suddenly cut off by thunder. The lights backstage go out, and when they come back on, another message written in blood is on the back wall...*

TONIGHT

Seriously, BG, what the hell is this?

Don't worry 'bout it, Jimmy; This doesn't involve you. I guess it's time for s*** t' go down tonight.

*BG James and Jimmy Rave leave.*
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

Alright, now I got myself a tag partner I'm asking, Don, that you book us in a #1 contenders match of some kind so we can have a shot at that title and those drunks that have it right now[/color]
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

Ray:AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH
D-Von did you...............Did you hear That?
Afro Thunder and The Tin Sheik wanna Tag Title Shot?
BECAUSE THEY BEAT EACH OTHER AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAH

Kid I don't give you enough Credit you are one funny Curtain Jerker

D-Von:Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Ray? I think Not so Cold Austin here was serious

Ray:Theres no way in Hell he was serious D
I Mean c'mon we just beat the FORMER Tag Champs and who did they beat?

EACH F*N OTHER

AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA Somebody call Comedy Central we got there newest star
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

Well, let's keep this simple so the words can get through your fat into your brains, or lack thereof.

I never asked for a title shot, I understand how things work around here. I asked for number one contender's match[/color]
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

And in fact, Don, I have another request. I want that match to be against Team 3D. After what they put me through a few weeks ago, I owe them some hurt.[/color]
____________________________________________________

Jay Lethal - mikeyp

Jack Tunney, Black Machismo in a Number 1 Contender's Match, dig it?
____________________________________________________

Team 3D - TTS

*Brother Ray is rolling on the Floor Laughing*
Ray:OH GAWD YOUR KILLIN ME YA LITLLE HOROWITZ
AAHHAHAHAHAGHAGHAHAHHAHAHHA

*D-Von smiles*

D-Von:You don't seriously think you can beat Anybody do ya?

Beer Money Inc V1 A Great pair of wrestlers who have a Huge amount of Experience in The Tag ranks

The Motor City Machine Guns Arguably one of the Best Teams around and the Future of this Company

LAX One of the Most Highflying Tag Teams outside of Mexico with a Huge Future in the Tag Ranks and Singles Competition

and Us

What Do All these have in common?

*Ray stands up with Tears rolling down his Face*

Ray:YOU'VE GOT A SNOWBALLS CHANCE IN HELL OF BEATING EM AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA
____________________________________________________

Austin Creed - madhackrviper

Looking deadly serious

You two pile of lards have no, no idea what I'm capable of yet, understand?[/color]
____________________________________________________

Brother Ray - TTS

Ray:We can pop in a Brooklyn Brawler match and get the General Idea
____________________________________________________

Jay Lethal - mikeyp

Ooo yeah, dig it. Next week, I'm going to win the Royal Rumble and I will be X-Division Champion.
____________________________________________________

BG James - The Tank

*As Joe celebrates his victory, BG James rises from the commentary table and picks up a microphone.*

Joe, don't take none of what's about t' happen personal, a'ight? This is only business. This is nothin' more than makin' an impact.

*Suddenly, the lights in the iMPACT! Zone cut off. A thunderbolt is heard, and when the lights return, Kiyoshi is in the ring standing over the fallen Samoa Joe, whose face is covered in what seems to be black mist. BG James enters the ring.*

Like I said, Joe, IMPACT!!! AND WHO BETTER F'R MAKIN' AN IMPACT THAN THE

TNA X-DIVISION CHAMPION OF THA WOOOOOOORLD!!!!!

KIYOSHI!!!!!!!

*Kiyoshi delivers a few kicks to Joe, then the champ and BG James leave the ring.*
____________________________________________________

Kiyoshi - Amigo

*Stands solemnly with a pair of bladed Nunchaku*

WCTNA Impact Ends

[Sweeter n' even more Sour]

Traci and the Lace... Ep. 1

EARLIER TODAY...

*Traci is shown in the back. She appears to be fixing a sandwhich as Lacey walks on screen.*

Hey, Traci. Um... what are you doing?

Just fixing this sandwhich.

Isn't it a little early to be eating?

Oh, its not for me.

Really?! *Lacey reaches for the sandwhich but Traci smacks her hand.* Ow!

Its not for you either.

Oh.. well, that's ok too... i guess

Besides, I thought you said it was 'too early' to eat.

Early for you. But its never too early for me. I'm always hungry. But I probably wouldn't have liked it anyway. What's in it?

Corn beef on periwinkle w/ dill pickle... and light mayomnaise.

Really?! That's like my favorite sandwhich ever!!

*look*

Are you sure its not for me?

Trust me, I'm sure. Its for Mr. Sobol. I've been given some inside information, that as odd as it may seem, that this too is HIS favorite item for consumption as well.

Chris? Why is he getting it?!

I'm a little worried as to why you call him by his first name... but it matters not. Why? Because, dear, he's the VP of operations here at TNA. He's the chairman on the board of directors who decides who runs this show. This... *holds up the sandwhich, now wrapped in saran wrap* ... is to help butter him up as I make my case. Now, I know I can make a compelling enough arguement without the need of such cheap tactics, but I figure I may as well better my odds.

*Lacey's stomache rumbles* Can you make me one too?

No time for that now. Come, we have to head over to TNA Headquarters right away. We need to make haste.

I'd rather we 'make sandwich'... *Lacey follows Traci out of the room as the scene fades.*

===

*Scene opens in a large meeting room with several men in suits. There is also a woman there filling coffee mugs with fresh coffee.*

I tell you what, that Jay Lethal was one funny cat. OOOHHHH YEEEAAAA!!! Ha ha!

*The rest quickly nod their heads.*

Oh yes. Mr. Sobol.

He was quite the comedian!

Funny stuff!

It was a smart move by us to make him the face of the company.

*More head nodding.*

Absolutly!

Brilliant! Mr. Sobol!

Commendable!

But after the passing of Macho Man Randy Savage, we could no longer sponser someone like that. It was no longer PC!

Dubious!

Disgraceful!

Disgusting!

So we just had to let him go. And I hope the door didn't hit him on the way out... haw haw haw.

*The rest of the men laugh as the woman in the room speaks up.* Um, you do know he hasn't done that gimmick in a long long time, right?

*Sobol stops laughing and glares at the woman as the rest of the men gasp and push away from the table. He then flips up a panel revealing a large red button and he presses it. Suddenly a group of eight heavily armed men bust into the room and quickly overtake the woman and drag her out. As they exit the room, Lacey and Traci walk in.*

I wonder what that was all about.

Probably forgot to bring the creamer.

Can't find good help these days.

And what do you two want?!

Um. Hello, Mr. Sobol! I think you will find that we have a meeting with you at the present time.

*Looking down at his schedule* Well, it appears you are right. This had better be good. I haven't filled my future endeavors quota for the month.

Didn't they just fire like ten people?

Be quiet Lacey, and let me do the talking.

Ok Traci, but please hurry. I'm very hungry.

Mr. Sobol I come with you with a business proposal that you cannot refuse. Let me begin by giving you the current state of affairs here in TNA...

*The camera backs out of the doorway and the door closes. Traci's voice becomes fainter and fainter as the scene fades to black.*

===

*Scene cuts to the meeting room again as Traci finishes giving her arguement.*

So in closing, TNA is controlled by lying, coniving, manipulative people who make poor decisions when it matters most. Put me in charge of the week to week operations of TNA and I promise... no... i guarantee that this brand will be the lone wolf sitting on top of the industry in no time!

Wow... you make a very compelling arguement. And I'm sitting on the fence right now as we speak. On the one hand we have a product that is popular, bringing in the money, and the notoriety of a competitive business. On the other hand, there is you with all your fancy words. Its a difficult decision to be made. I may need to think on this a while... if only there was something that could tip the scale one way or the other.

Well, while you deliberate, can I interest you in a mid evening snack. I'm sure a great business man such as yourself gets really hungy making such important decisions every day.

Hmmm, Now that you mention it. I am a little hungry.

A hunger that might be satisfied by a Corn beef on periwinkle w/ dill pickle.... and light mayomnaise.

Really?! That's like my favorite sandwhich ever!!

*Poorly acting suprised.* OOOhhhh realllly? I didn't know that. What a coincidence! One Corn beef on periwinkle w/ dill pickle.... and light mayomnaise coming right up!

*Turning around.*

Lacey, can you pass me the sandwhich? *Notices Lacey is asleep* LACEY!

*Startled* HMM... WHAT?! Oh, hi Traci.

Lacey, its time. The sandwhich. *looking around frantically* Where is it?

Oh, well. You see. I don't have it anymore Traci. I sort of... you know... ate it. And I always want a nap after I...

YOU WHAT?!?!

Well, I was hungry. And you had been talking for a really...really... long time. And it just looked so lonely there.

*rubbing forhead* Don't you realize how terrible of a mistake that was?

Oh, trust me Traci. I know. Next time I will know to take it out of the plastic wrap first.

*look

*Traci turns back around to meet the hungry eyes of Sobol.* Um. Mr. Sobol. It appears we are no longer in possession of said Corn beef on periwinkle w/ dill pickle.... and light mayomnaise at the present time.

*Getting visibly upset.* You mean you said you had it and you don't?

Well I...

You got my hopes up only to dash them away later?

Yes, you see..

No... I DO see! You are no different than what you are claiming of those in power now! You are a lying, coniving, manipulative person who made a poor decision when it mattered most!

Mr. Sobol, please. I..

As for your request. There's an old saying. Better to deal with the devil you know... than the devil you don't!! *He flips the panel and slams his fist down on the red button. Within seconds Traci and Lacey are thrown out of the building.*

So close...

Well, it is best to look at the bright side.

And what's that, Lacey?

The other side of the building, where the sun is shining.

*Sigh* Come, lets go get some supper.

I'm not really all that hungry, Traci.

Then we'll hit a drive through. We need to start planning for next week.

Why, what are we doing next week?

Same thing we weren't able to do this week... Try to take over the show!

*Fade to black*

[Sweeter n' even more Sour]

Traci and the Lace... Ep 2


Part 1:

*Earlier today*

*Traci is shown in the back messing with some recording equipment when Lacey walks up.*

Hiya Traci! What are you doing?

Oh, just planning on taking over TNA with the most genious of plans. How about you?

Well I can tell you for sure that i'm not planning anything like that. At least I don't think I am. I kinda forgot what I was doing, actually.

Would it happen to be eating that popsicle that you are holding!

Nah. It wouldn't be something like... wait... you know what? I think you are right! *Licks the popsicle* Nice job there Traci!

*Traci facepalms*

So what is that thing?

Oh this. Why, its a... music player. Yes... I was just testing it out. You want to hear?

Sure! I sure hope its Barbie Girl by Aqua!

I can assure that it is not. *Presses play and the begining of 'Semi-charmed Kind of Life begins to play'*

Oh... I like this song too. But its kinda old isn't it. Came out back in the ninet... oooo... *begins looking dizzy.* I'm feeling all wooooozy. *Starts doing jumping jacks*

*Presses stop on the player* Excellent! It works! You may stop doing that now.

*Lacey stops doing jumping jacks.* Whoa.. what happened?

I took control of your mind, Lacey

*sigh of relief* Oh good, I've been trying to do that for years.

Indeed. Anyway, to explain how I did so. Inside that song I planted a subliminal message.

Sublime? That wasn't Sublime. That was Third Eye Blind. But don't worry, lots of people get them confused. I know I did.

SublimINAL Lacey. It is a hidden message designed to control the thoughts of the people who hear it and make them do what you want them to do.



*Rewinds tape* Watch. I'm going to turn down the volume of the song, and turn up the volume of the hidden message... *presses play*

Hello, you are now under my control. You will do what I say, when I tell you to do it. To test this, start doing jumping jacks right now. *Traci presses stop*

Oooooo.. That's amazing Traci! We could so use that to get candy or hugs or get people to come to our halloween party! You know I haven't recieved a single RSVP yet?!

...Or I could use it to make the fans to walk out and refuse to buy any TNA tickets until I have been named Management Director!

Oh yes. That too.. i guess..

Now all I have to do is change the message so that I can begin my crusade! *Presses record*

"Dear TNA fans. You have been made a mockery by this company for long enough. You have paid your hard earned cash week in and week out to continue to watch the same drabble for too long! Stop throwing away your money! It is time for a change! That is why you must turn your faith over to me, Traci Brooks, to lead this company into the future as the new Management Director... or threaten to stop giving TNA your money. Cheer me and let your voices be heard. Let them know that you are ready for that change!"

*Presses stop*

There. That should do it. Now, we just have to play this song during one of the commercial breaks and the show will be ours!

Oh. I'm so happy for you!

I just need to get changed for my soon to be adoring fans. Lacey, can you please rewind the tape and retrieve it? We need to get it to the production booth before the show begins.

Sure!

*Lacey begins working with the recorder as Traci turns to get changed. You hear a faint Oops! as the scene fades to black*

... Part 2


*Shot opens up with Traci in a very fancy buisness outfit.*

There. Much better. Ready Lacey?

*Lacey is showns still working on the machine*

What's taking so long?

Oh nothing. Its almost ready.

Give it to me now!

*Traci reaches down and hits the eject button and retrieves the tape.*

We must go! Now, I have found out that TNA has hired a new intern to stand guard outside the production booth. And since I don't trust you to make the switch properly, do you think you can at least distract him long enough for me to slip this tape into the booth?

Sure! No problem!

Good, lets go then.

--- Part 3

*Traci is shown crouched down focused on the production booth, Lacey is off screen.*

Ok, there he is. Go distract him and I'll take care of the rest.

Got it.

*Lacey walks past Traci. and the camera shows her from behind walking up to the booth.*

Why hello there. How ya doin'?

*Looking at Lacey suspisciously* Ok, i guess.

So I heard you are new around these parts.

Why does her voice sound so funny?

*Just then Lacey turns her head and you can see her wearing a fake mustache and talking in an unconvincing lower toned voice. Traci facepalms.*



Yea. My name is Sam. I'm interning here. I was hoping to work with some of the wrestlers, or on the writing staff, or something cool. But instead they have me guarding a production booth.

Yea. That sucks. By the way, ummm.... did you see that play last night... from that one professional sports team against the other team? Wow, what a play huh?

What? Oh. Yea. That was a cool play. I can't believe.. *Sam steps away from the door to talk and Lacey motions towards Traci.*

...huh...Wonders never cease. Even a blind dumb squirell sometimes finds a nut.

*Traci quickly darts into the production booth and back out again. She motions for Lacey to hurry.*

..And then when he turned..

Oh look...ahem... i mean...Oh, look at the time. I need to be going.

...But you don't have a watch.

Inner clocks are much more accurate. They don't need batteries.

Hmmm...true. Never looked at it that way.

Bye!

Later!

*Lacey catches up with Traci.*

We did it Lacey! Lord only knows how. But we did it. Now we just have to wait for them to play the song and the show will be mine! Ha ha ha!

*Fade to black*

-- Part 4

This is it, Lacey. They are about to play the song!

*Semi-charmed life begins to play. And Traci steps out onto the stage. After a few moments people begin to cheer.*

We did it Lacey!

*Suddenly Traci starts getting pelted with coins of all sizes. Dimes, nickles, quarters.*

Ow! Hey! What's going on!? Stop that!

*Then the crowd begins to throw their drinks and popcorn at her. Drenching her suit and having popcorn stuck to her. After a few moments more of abuse, Traci runs to the back.*

I don't understand what happened. They were in love with me, and they just turned against me.

*Suddenly the door to the production booth behind them flies open and one of the crew steps into view.*

How the hell did this get in here?! This song is old news! Noone wants to hear it now! *Tosses the tape out and lands at the feet of Traci.*

Hmm.. I wonder. *Grabs the tape, turns and puts it in her recording machine*

How did that get here? We left it back in the dressing room!

Quiet Lacey!

*'Semi-charmed kind of Life' like begins to play. Traci turns down the volume of the music and turns up the volume up.

"Um.. hi TNA people. You don't think you can hear me right now but you can.. kind of like a ghost.. but voice ghost. Anyway, I kind of messed up Traci's message earlier and am now re-recording it. I know she wanted you to cheer, so could you please do that? She also wanted to come out there tonight and said something about getting your change. I'm sure you have lots left over after you bought popcorn and drinks. Come to think of it, if you have any of that left over, I'm sure she wouldn't mind you giving her some of that as well. I know I would. "

"What's taking so long? "

"Oh nothing. Its almost ready."

"Give it to me now! "[/i][/color]*click*

*Traci facepalms.*

So what do you want to do now, Traci?

We need to head back to the hotel room and plan for next week.

Why, what are we doing next week? Listening to CHUMBAWAMBA?

No. The same thing we do ever week. Try to take over the show! And take that silly mustache off!!

*Fade to black*